attempts to acknowledge the sufferer’s anguish and chaotic feelings with a “You” statement: “How awful you must be feeling.” “This must be a difficult time for you.” “You must have felt really desperate to do this.” “It’s impossible to imagine what you must be going through.” It is important not to confuse empathy with sympathy (“I feel so sorry for you”; “you poor thing”), which may elicit rage over perceived condescension. Also,