The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires

by Grady Hendrix

they were all in this together, and if their husbands ever took out a life insurance policy on them they were in trouble.

“Only if it’s a real invitation,” he said. “Consider yourself invited,”

Bruh

“I’m a big Ayn Rand fan,”

Fucking yikes

“A reader lives many lives,” James Harris said. “The person who doesn’t read lives but one. But if you’re happy just doing what you’re told and reading what other people think you should read, then don’t let me stop you. I just find it

Ayn Rand,

WEEWOO WEEWOO

Gated communities let you choose your neighbors so the people around you are the kind of people you want around your children.

*tweet* Hol up

“Why do you pretend what we do is nothing?” she asked. “Every day, all the chaos and messiness of life happens and every day we clean it all up. Without us, they would just wallow in filth and disorder and nothing of any consequence would ever get done. Who taught you to sneer at that? I’ll tell you who. Someone who took their mother for granted.”

There isn’t anything wrong with him because people who have something wrong with them don’t live here.”

“I have nothing to say to Mr. Harris,” she said. “I think he’s not who he says he is and I think all anyone would need to do is look inside his mini-storage unit to see I’m right.”

Hell yeah

“Clean all you want,” Patricia said. “But whenever Bennett has a drink, he’s still going to smack you in the mouth.”

WOOF

but it was how much you had to love your son to come back from Hell to warn him. And then she remembered that Miss Mary hadn’t come back to warn Carter. She’d came back to warn her.

YO CHILL :'(