When I give talks, people always seem surprised by the finding that joy is the most vulnerable human emotion. Given that I study fear and shame, people are hesitant to believe that something as positive as joy can make us squirm. Then I share what is almost certainly the most surprising finding for most people: If you’re afraid to lean into good news, wonderful moments, and joy—if you find yourself waiting for the other shoe to drop—you are not alone. It’s called “foreboding joy,” and most of us experience it. This is when things get really quiet. Foreboding joy is one of those practically
...more
