Part of Your World

by Abby Jimenez

“Don’t let them decide the life you’re going to live. You only get one.”

But beggars can’t be choosers,

“Just keep her laughing,” Doug said. “When a woman laughs, her eyes are closed more. She won’t notice how ugly you are.”

“I could never relax, I started getting depressed, I had anxiety all the time. I was miserable and I felt totally trapped while at the same time feeling grateful that he was with me, because who else would want me?”

Everyone’s favorite guy, Neil? Complain about him being a good boyfriend and letting me know that my breath smells bad? You’d probably be more inclined to think that he was trying to help me out than to believe that he was being purposely cruel. It wouldn’t even surprise me if you didn’t believe me now—”

“Ali, men are two things. Disappointing and consistent. I believe you.” I don’t know what it was. Saying it out loud to someone I’d hidden it from for so long. The tiny victory of claiming one of our mutual friends to my side, or just having someone else know it and believe it—but my chin started to quiver.

it was a finally moment. Like arriving at a finish line or letting go of a breath you’ve been holding—or coming home. It’s the release that happens when you don’t have to think about anything at all.

He was in the worst position to be generous, yet he was. And she was in the best position to show grace, and she didn’t. And doing it would have cost her nothing.

he spent most of the dates looking at his phone or talking about himself. God. How had I not seen it? But then I knew how I didn’t see it. Because I’d been raised by a man who valued prestige more than he valued things like integrity and honesty. This was normal to me.

I realized that this was one of the things Neil used to maintain control over me. Only he could take care of the house. How would I survive without him? I couldn’t even cook.

Neil wanted me to have the illusion that I needed him, that I couldn’t be alone. I had to be taken care of. I couldn’t manage a house. I’d never eat that quiche again unless he made it for me. I peered up at Daniel waiting for him to shame me for my lack of kitchen skills, like Neil always did. But he just shrugged. “Okay, let me show you.” I felt my face soften.

“He says the town has a way of protecting itself. That it gets what it needs. He thinks you were here today because Hannah needed you.”

“Did you know that dogs developed eyebrow muscles to better manipulate us?”

Wolves don’t have them. Dogs that had more expressive faces were more likely to connect with their owners. So they evolved.” She nodded sideways. “To this.”

I don’t think he wanted me to advance. Like it made him feel threatened that I might end up his equal in any way. I think he liked the trophy aspect of having a Montgomery for a girlfriend, as long as I stayed beneath him.

“Nobody likes assholes,” I said quietly. “Sometimes that’s just what you think you deserve.”

It was bred into him, like medicine was bred into me. His kingdom was smaller and his legacy was different, but he was tied to his birthright just like I was tied to mine.

“I believe you. I can handle anything you need to tell me. You don’t need to protect me from the truth

and I’m here to help you in any way I can. It’s not your fault. And you don’t deserve it.”

They make you feel like you’re the best thing to ever happen to them, like you’re the most special woman in the world—like you’re seeing something rare. But that’s the trap. It’s how they get you close enough to drown you. And Liz? Nobody can save you until you’re ready to save yourself.”

I didn’t like that others had to take care of me. I wanted to know how to take care of myself. I wanted to pull my weight and learn to be self-reliant so that when I did depend on someone, it was by choice and not necessity.

When you don’t care, everything’s on your terms. They can take it or leave it. It doesn’t matter to you, so ask for whatever the hell you want.

Dad never expected me to amount to much. And for a time, neither did I. My entire life, Dad made me feel like I was the weakest link, the most useless princess. A waste of my family’s DNA. But today I was a Montgomery. It pulsed through my veins, poured out of me. It felt like I was the final form of everything my bloodline aspired to be.

Because sometimes family isn’t what you’re born into. Sometimes family is found.