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“Hatred isn’t rational,” Jordan said quietly. And people could hold onto childhood grudges for a long time.
“It’s something of a family tradition,” Jordan said curtly. He had no intention of telling Nate that this supposed tradition started since his little brother had gone missing last year. After that, Jordan’s father had insisted that everyone in the family should wear jewelry with a GPS tracker. It was invasive, sure, but Jordan knew his parents would never abuse his privacy without a very good reason, and he was willing to sacrifice some of his privacy if it made his mother sleep better.
“My apologies,” Paolo said with a friendly, sheepish smile. His English was heavily accented but perfectly fine. “I said I could see why Raffa switched teams for you.” Remembering that Nate was supposed to be a friendly guy, Jordan smiled. “Thanks. Could you show us our rooms? We’re pretty tired after the flight.”
Silence reigned. There was a strange sort of weight in the air, something expectant, almost wary. Only Damiano seemed immune to the tension, eating calmly. He wasn’t oblivious to it; not at all. This man was perfectly aware of the discomfort in the room. He was enjoying it, Jordan realized after a moment.
Damiano chuckled. “You’re positively adorable.” Maybe he’d misheard. “Pardon?” Jordan said, without looking at him. It took everything in him not to look at him. He felt the other man lean closer to him and then murmur close to his ear, “It’s adorable how you pretend not to be interested when spying on me is the main reason you’re here.”
Chuckling, Damiano got to his feet and patted him on the head condescendingly, like one would pat a dog. “You’re pretty enough, for a guy, but I don’t swing that way, so your doe eyes are wasted on me, bello.”
“Zio Damiano!” a childish voice exclaimed before a very short person climbed into Damiano’s lap. The chubby little girl, no older than four or five, pecked Damiano loudly on his cheek, giving him a sweet smile and chattering nonstop in Italian. “What?” Jordan whispered, staring at the strange sight. Damiano wasn’t smiling at the girl—his expression was faintly long-suffering and irritated—but he was tolerating having a very loud child on his lap with surprising patience.
Jordan snorted, but he couldn’t deny that talking to Damiano helped. It was a wonderful distraction from the fact that they were in a tiny cellar. Damiano had a really good voice: low-pitched and pleasant without being too gruff. He would have made a great audiobook narrator—if he had any emotional range.
“And here I was starting to think you might have a heart,” Jordan said, making a show of taking Damiano’s hand with great reluctance. “I do,” Damiano said, closing his eyes again. “It serves to send blood to my organs.” “No one told me you were funny.” Jordan’s unsteady breathing evened out a little as he squeezed Damiano’s hand and found the pulse at his wrist.
“Are you under the impression that I’m a cuddler?” Damiano said. He sounded a mix of coldly amused and irritated. “No,” Jordan said, squirming closer and throwing an arm around him. “But I don’t care. I have no intention of getting pneumonia and dying before we’re rescued. So suck it up. This is the smart thing to do. You know I’m right. Getting a cold would only make you weaker on top of those nasty bruises you’re sporting.” “You’re extremely aggravating.” “I’ll take that as a compliment, coming from you.”
Damiano remained very tense against him for a long time. After what seemed like forever, his body slowly relaxed, his breathing evening out. Feeling like he’d won some important battle, Jordan allowed himself to drift off.
“Don’t you dare die on me,” he whispered furiously, wiping sweat from Damiano’s dark brow. “Imagine how pleased your family will be if you die. You’re more spiteful than that, aren’t you?”
Jordan helped him drink, brushing the dark hair off Damiano’s sweaty forehead with the other hand. He froze a little, realizing what he’d just done. He’d become so used to touching Damiano’s hair—touching his everything—while he had been feverish that it came as second nature now. Jordan cleared his throat a little. “You need a haircut,” he said, trying to act as though there was nothing unusual about his behavior. “Though you’re totally rocking the Ben Barnes look, it’s not very practical when you get locked up in a dungeon and tortured for days.” Damiano was looking at him with a strange
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There was nothing else in this cellar but them. No phones, no Internet, no entertainment. Just them, entangled in each other 24/7. His days started and ended with Damiano. He was the first thing on his mind when he woke up and the last thing when he fell asleep.
“Sounds stupid,” Damiano said, his teeth worrying Jordan’s neck. Jordan squirmed, shivering. “What are you doing?” “I’m hungry.” “Please don’t tell me you’re a cannibal on top of being a sociopath.” “All right. I won’t.” Damiano bit him on the neck. Jordan laughed, because obviously it was a joke. Right? “Stop that,” Jordan said. There! He was setting some boundaries! Damiano only bit harder, making hot pain shoot through Jordan’s neck.
“I know this is weird,” the other man said, clearing his throat a little. “I know it probably isn’t real—just the circumstances, forced proximity, my phobia, and the stress—but… I care for you. I feel safe with you. I don’t want you to die or get hurt—ow, stop that!” Damiano bit him on the neck again, just to shut him up. Apparently words could cause a dopamine high, too. What an unpleasant discovery.
Damiano opened his eyes. “Raffaele? What about him?” Lorenzo snorted. “Looks like he has another boytoy on the side. I’ve listened in to some snatches of his phone calls and they were pretty damning. No wonder he wasn’t all that freaked out over his boyfriend’s disappearance.”
Damiano strode toward the house, ignoring the burning pain in his back. He had no desire to watch them kiss or something equally nauseating. “I’d be more careful, boss,” Lorenzo said, catching up to him. “You might shoot your leg.” Damiano gave him a blank look before realizing that he had his finger on the trigger of his gun. Slowly, he took the finger off and turned the safety on. He was calm. He was calm and collected. He had nothing to be angry about.
He wanted Damiano. He wanted to sleep with Damiano. Wanted to smell him, to hear his voice. To have him on top of him, feel the reassuring weight of his muscular body crushing him, making him feel safe. Everything in him ached for it, for his closeness.
He breathed deeply, his muscles relaxing and all the remaining anxiety leaving his body. Damiano murmured something in Italian and threw his arm over Jordan, hauling him close and stretching half on top of him in his customary position. Jordan smiled sleepily, feeling a rush of unbearable affection. For a man who didn’t cuddle Damiano sure had his favorite way of doing so. He was still smiling as he fell asleep, feeling perfectly content with the world.
He’d known the guy for thirteen days. He shouldn’t have been such a mess when he couldn’t even define what Damiano had become to him. Someone not quite a friend and not quite a lover. Someone he loathed, needed, and adored. Someone he understood on an intimate level and didn’t understand at all. Someone who, in different circumstances, in another life, might have become more.
Pretending to be engrossed in his phone, he stopped in the middle of the street just as a car came around the corner. The car was coming with too much speed, and the driver honked frantically, but Jordan pretended to be too distracted to hear. Come on, come on, come on. Just as he was about to give up—no test was worth his life—someone grabbed his arm and yanked him back. He quickly turned, his heart in his throat, and found the same guy from before trying to disappear into the crowd. Well, fuck.
He was shaking with a horrible mix of toxic anger and irrational excitement. He told himself the anger was the prevailing emotion. Who did Damiano think he was, putting bodyguards on him without asking Jordan’s opinion when the asshole hadn’t even bothered to come out to say goodbye to him? Arrogant, overbearing dick. (God, he missed him.) Jesus. It pissed him off that the mere possibility of being followed—stalked—by Damiano’s people pleased a part of him. It means that he cares, said a small, stupid voice at the back of his mind, like a little girl hugging her favorite toy to her chest and
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He was shaking with a horrible mix of toxic anger and irrational excitement. He told himself the anger was the prevailing emotion. Who did Damiano think he was, putting bodyguards on him without asking Jordan’s opinion when the asshole hadn’t even bothered to come out to say goodbye to him? Arrogant, overbearing dick. (God, he missed him.) Jesus. It pissed him off that the mere possibility of being followed—stalked—by Damiano’s people pleased a part of him. It means that he cares, said a small, stupid voice at the back of his mind, like a little girl hugging her favorite toy to her chest and
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“I bought the building opposite this one,” Damiano said. “It’s secure now.” Jordan looked at the skyscraper visible in the window and nearly laughed. “Right. Of course you did.” Shaking his head, he loosened his tie and pulled it off. “Look, I’ve had a spectacularly shitty day. Just tell me why you’re here and go. I have a hot date with my pillow I really don’t want to miss.” Damiano eyed him for a moment before stubbing his cigarette out on the windowsill. “You look terrible, caro.” Something lodged in his throat. “Thanks.”
“I don’t need to have you stalked for that,” Damiano said, his nostrils flaring as his eyes roamed all over Jordan’s face. “You do look terrible. Too pale. Sickly. Almost plain.” “Oh, wow,” Jordan said with a laugh. “You sure know how to make a guy feel special.” Damiano’s face did something strange: a tight, pinched look, his eyes all pissy and angry, before he stepped forward and shoved his face into Jordan’s neck.
It was the best sleep he’d gotten in months. When he woke up, the bed was empty. Damiano had slipped out of his bed and his life like he had never been in it.
Mine, the thing inside him said. Mineminemine. He tried to quash it, but it was fruitless. He could barely think as he reached for his phone and found Jordan’s number. He pressed Call before he could stop himself. He watched Jordan flinch as his phone went off. Jordan looked at the screen and his face went very still. Jordan didn’t have his number, of course. But the Italian country code would probably give him an idea of who might be calling him.
“What happened to you being straight?” Damiano said. “None of your business,” Jordan said, stretching out on the couch and putting his head on a throw pillow. He looked tired and soft with his hair rumpled. “But if you must know, I was horny and worked up, and that guy was just there. I figured I might as well let him suck my cock.” “And him looking like a poor man’s version of me is pure coincidence?”
pfft- Jordan, kinda pathetic that you tried to find someone who looks close to how Damiano looks- that's impossible, he's one of a kind 💅🏻
The next time he made Jordan jerk off wearing only his shirt. It sated the hunger a little, but it wasn’t enough. He knew this kind of possessiveness was ugly and creepy, but it still wasn’t enough. Damiano ended up fucking a fleshlight as he watched Jordan fuck his own mouth with his fingers. It was probably weird, but definitely not as weird as sending the fleshlight full of his come to Boston via express courier delivery.
“I hate you,” Jordan said, panting, his eyes completely glazed over and his hips moving to meet his fingers. “At least send me a picture of your cock.” Damiano licked his lips, staring at Jordan’s hole. “I can do better.” That was how he ended up sending Jordan a custom dildo shaped like his cock.