The term fictive kinship—which I think is a fancy term for “find your people”—refers to strong social ties that aren’t established by marriage or by blood.[4] Interestingly, some researchers assert that the happiest people are those who have the strongest fictive-kinship bonds: their own family was a disaster, so they went and formed a new one to call their own.
I have something to say about this too. I have seen people - and they are always Jesus people - who do this and it is enormously hurtful to the actual family members. For instance, I knew someone whose mom was dying of cancer. The dying mom would lavish praise on her “spiritual daughter”, while her *actual* daughter had to experience this diminishment.
Now, having said that, I think it can work fine to have an “uncle Paul” who isn’t really an uncle but fits into your family so completely that the kids don’t even realize that until they’re twelve. So those things are okay. But I think it’s wrong to bestow terms like “spiritual daughter” and “spiritual mother” on people when the actual relative of that name is still in the picture.
