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“God gave you ribs for a reason, Elwood,” my father scolds quietly when I return. I don’t need a mirror to know my lower lip is trembling. “Don’t wear your heart so openly on your sleeve.”
Other people know to draw back when they touch a flame. I only know how to walk through the coals.
Because at the end of the day, what does it matter if I stay breathing if her life is in danger? My staying here would kill her. You don’t keep a lion as a house cat. There are creatures that can turn on you in the blink of an eye, and now I’m one of them.
If I let myself, I’ll fall prey to my dark thoughts and never crawl out. Mom said dark thoughts were ships passing in the night. You can choose to watch them go. You don’t need to sail away with each one.
When you’re angry, she says, it’s like you’re on fire. You need to cool off or you’ll burn yourself and those you care about.