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by
Abby Jimenez
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December 30, 2024 - January 1, 2025
I’d been with Neil seven years. I thought Neil would be the last man I’d ever be with. Then I’d broken up with him and I told myself that I was done. No more men. I didn’t need one. I didn’t need the hassle. I completely rejected the idea of dating ever again. I’d bought a very nice vibrator and I’d retired myself from the pool at thirty-seven. Zero interest. And now I was flirting. It was like finding out a plant you killed was alive after all and just needed water.
I felt a hand on my arm. “Don’t let them decide the life you’re going to live. You only get one.” The words hung there between us. But I was too weak to pick them up. Derek knew the truth. I had no choice in the matter now. I’d never, ever get away.
“So you came home in a muddy two-thousand-dollar dress wearing one shoe and your fuck buddy’s camo hoodie.” I nodded. “That is correct.” “Like an Old MacDonald walk of shame. Did you have hay in your hair?” I started laughing. “Shut up.” It was sawdust, actually, but I wasn’t telling her that.
Black bugs zipped around in front of the screen. “What are those?” she asked, nodding at them. “Dragonflies,” I said, wiping my hands on a napkin. “Though it’s a little early for them. It’s been kind of warm this spring.” She squinted at them. “There’s so many.” I leaned back on my hands. “My grandma used to say that dragonflies mean change is coming.” She went quiet for a moment. “Must be a lot of change.”
Daniel somehow managed to be charming and completely down-to-earth while also exuding pure sex. It was the most baffling combination. And one I wasn’t capable of refusing.
He pivoted to look at me. “The doctor! Acting like you don’t know who I’m talkin’ about…” he muttered. “The town’ll get ’er back.” I wrinkled my brows at him. “I don’t follow.” “The town! It’ll get ’er back! It picks who it wants. I’ve known every lifer going back ninety-six years. I know one when I see one. Your grandparents, you, Doug, Doreen. Not your mama. I knew it the moment she came into the world, she weren’t for here. The town knew it too, let her leave.” I blinked at him. “Let her leave?” He looked at me for a moment, squinting with his good eye. “It’s alive, you know.” “What’s
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I smiled and flipped his ears back and let out a long breath. “How you think we did, buddy? Think she’ll call us?” He looked over at me, his tongue lolling out of his mouth. Then I noticed my black hoodie was missing from the hook by the front door.
He hustled me into a corner and slipped his arms around my waist, beaming down at me. “So you don’t know how to peel potatoes, but you can deliver a baby?” “What, like it’s hard?” He laughed and kissed me. And I didn’t care that he did it in front of everyone either.
“Let me guess. You’re taking a top-down shot, using the flash, standing in your shitty garage bathroom, you can see your feet in the picture and you’re wearing socks.” I looked down. Shit. I heard his engine turn over. “That’s what I thought. Don’t do anything until I get there.” “Doug—” “DON’T DO ANYTHING UNTIL I GET THERE.” He hung up on me. Fifteen minutes later Doug walked in. He had a ring light.
It was gentle and ethereal and soft, and they hovered around us, moving in slow motion. Daniel put up a finger to touch one, and the disturbed air swirled the petals like snowflakes in a flurry. “Have you ever seen anything so perfectly beautiful?” I breathed. I turned to Daniel. But he wasn’t watching the petals anymore. He was looking at me. “Yes…” he said quietly, holding my eyes. “You.” Then he slipped warm hands onto my cheeks, and in front of the moon and the heavens and the magic that was swirling around us, he kissed me. The world stopped turning. We were suspended in frozen animation.
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No matter what she did, Jake would win. Neil was still winning too, in a hundred different ways. Sometimes it feels like the bad guys always do.
couldn’t say I could really fault him for chasing down things that could hurt him. I couldn’t stop doing it either.
He was my boyfriend. We were in love. And it didn’t change a thing. Not really.
It would never happen. This was the price of their prejudice. Grace would have cost them nothing.
I fell into one of those sleeps of the brokenhearted. The kind that breathes in and out, between here and gone. You want to dream about them but then regret it when you do, because waking up hurts too much. So you hope for nothing but black. The temporary reprieve from existing without them.
There’s something more final than forever. It’s never. Never is infinite.
“You don’t have to feel like this. You literally don’t. Quit. Leave. Pick him. Pick yourself.”
All I wanted was Daniel.
Because sometimes family isn’t what you’re born into. Sometimes family is found.

