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Change that is worth it always demands conscious effort, courage and persistence. You do not have to do it perfectly. You just have to keep going.
our mood is not fixed and it does not define who we are; it is a sensation we experience.
when dealing with mood it is essential to remember that it’s not all in your head. It’s also in your body state, your relationships, your past and present, your living conditions and lifestyle. It’s in everything you do and don’t do, in your diet and your thoughts, your movements and memories. How you feel is not simply a product of your brain.
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The way you feel also influences the types of thoughts that can pop into your head, making you more vulnerable to experiencing thoughts that are negative and self-critical.
The thing about the human brain is that, when you believe something, the brain will scan the environment for any signs that the belief is true.
When we feel low in mood, thoughts can become all-consuming in this way. The brain senses from the body that things are not OK and starts offering up lots of reasons why that may be.
Painful problems can be so overwhelming and demanding of our attention that we start to focus more on that and less on what we want instead.
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You are not your feelings and your feelings are not who you are.
The one person you most need the approval of is you.
Don’t neglect to notice the things you did well. Appreciate what worked and what didn’t.
To build self-acceptance we first need to understand who we are and who we want to be.
Self-acceptance involves listening to our own needs and meeting them.
When we learn to face the things that make us feel afraid, we get stronger. When we do that day after day, over time we develop a sense of growth.
Remember, compassion is not always the easy thing. It is not saying there is nothing to be scared of. It is the coach in your ear with a calm and firm voice that is encouraging you, supporting you, reminding you that you can and will move through this moment.
research shows that simply reminding someone that their performance improves under pressure improves their actual performance by 33% (Jamieson et al., 2018).
