Bridges to Heal US: Stories and Strategies for Racial Healing

by Erin Jones

It has been my experience that White people who do racial equity work are either like my mother—people who have a vested stake in the ground because of a very intimate personal relationship—or they are like the mom of the girl on the “other” team. White people who stay in the work stay engaged because they are already bonded in a relationship with someone who is personally impacted. They CHOOSE to bind themselves to a person or to a group of people they see is impacted.

Others will take even the conversation about race as a personal attack, “Just talking about race is racist.”

These responses often do not come from a place of malice but of ignorance and naïveté.

We hate to think that we are being accused of being “bad” people because we say or do the wrong thing.

If we are going to be and to build bridges that heal US as a nation, it will require fighting against the habits we have developed that encourage us not to have hard conversations, that enable us to get defensive when someone critiques us (and then to stop engaging), that cause us to think we can and should do everything on our own, that we ourselves are enough, that we do not need to hear the voices of others with different experiences and perspectives.

I invite you to let your identity BE a bridge for others to cross when appropriate or necessary. I invite you to let your identities help you BUILD bridges for others to join you on the journey.

What if I were to dress up like a basketball player and come into the session. And you ask the participants what they see when they see me? Like, how old do you think she is? Where do you think she is from? What do you think her dreams are?

Erin, compassion says we give him a clean outfit and help him get calm, but then it’s time to learn. Our pity is not useful. Our pity is not going to help him get out of this situation. He NEEDS to learn to read and write and do math, so his family is not

He needs our compassion. He doesn’t need our pity.”

Who are the “others” for you? Who are the groups of students or the neighborhoods for which you have a “single story” that shapes (negatively) how you think about them?

Although truly interrogating systems requires more study into history and policy, this process in your community is a critical beginning to understanding what equity could look like in your context.

School districts in the South intentionally forbade teachers from teaching about the evils of slavery and insisted only positive stories be told.

There are districts across the nation today that forbid any teaching of ethnic studies or mentions of the damages done by White people or the treaties that were broken between the American government and indigenous people.

They know it is bad to call someone a name, but they do not see the other insidious ways people with brown skin tones are treated differently by the systems we all interact with daily.

This is not who we are” in my book is code for, ‘We have not yet had the opportunity to manifest who we are, because there have not yet been Black students in our midst.’

He also has ADD, which means

Black people are reduced to two images—slave or superstar.

Our collective healing will require the latter, but we have not embedded attitudes of restoration and reconciliation into our systemic practices. We remain a nation bent on punishment, which shows up in the numbers of students we suspend and

For my White friends reading, there are two responses to these truths that are not useful: 1. Do not allow yourself to fall into the shame, blame, and guilt trap. You did not personally cause these things to happen. Shame, blame, and guilt will paralyze you, and they cause you to focus on yourself and

not on the reality at hand. Snap out of those emotions and back into, "What can I do to make things better now?" 2. Do not allow yourself to fall into the trap of believing that because you did not personally own slaves and your family did not personally force Native peoples into boarding schools, your hands are clean. We are all either part of the problem or part of the solution.

Take time to learn about the system in which you have the greatest influence and commit to do at least something small to interrupt ONE practice that harms the Black, B...

We cannot repair all of the harm at once, but if we can each, one step at a time, do something, and join forces whenever possible, a new season is possible.

but what will move the needle in this country is disrupting damaging attitudes, behaviors, and practices, building strong relationships between communities currently at odds, and influencing systems and organizations.

it is not your job to speak FOR Black and Brown and Native people. Whenever possible, it is your job to make space, to insist that others make space for them.