Believe Me (Shatter Me, #6.5)

by Tahereh Mafi

The dog settles so close to me its little black snout bumps my boot. I sigh.

stop acting like you don't love it

It is a miracle, then, that Ella’s love is louder; and I’m so grateful for the reassurance of her touch it pierces me through the chest.

Why is Warner such a fking poet

But no matter how much bloodshed and darkness she experiences, Ella never seems to lose hope in humanity.

The thought alone fills me with dread. Unbidden, I feel my hands tremble; I shove them in my pockets as I go.

This place is a zoo.

YOU LOVE DOGS STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DON'T!! WE ALL SAW YOU IN DESTROY ME WITH THE DANISH

I know he’s going to follow me even before he moves in my direction. Between him and the dog trailing me, I’d choose the dog.

AARON STOP

“What?” I say sharply. The approaching shadow soon evolves into flesh beside me, Kenji matching my strides down the overgrown path,

Please be best friends I need it

Sometimes I’m so desperate for quiet I think I might commit murder for a moment of silence.

Hey I can’t say I haven’t had these thoughts

And she likes my jokes.” “She’s very charitable, I know.”

AARON PLEASEEEEE

“Oh my God,” he says, his voice carrying. “Oh my God.” I pick up speed. “Hey— Don’t walk away from me when I’m about to say something awesome—”

hahahahahahahhaahHAHAHAH ITS 5 AM AND IM TRYING NOT TO CACKLE OUT LOUD KENJI PLS AARON IS ABOUT 5 SECS FROM PULLING HIS GLOCK OUT

“I was wrong,” he says, making a crude heart shape with his hands. “Sun and rain make a rainbow.” I come to a sudden halt. For a moment, I close my eyes.

IM SCREAMING ZEE COME GET UR MAN, AARON IS GOING TO THROTTLE HIM

I worry, constantly, that despite my efforts, I will not be able to be what she wants. It’s true; I am insufferable. I wonder whether it is only a matter of time before Ella discovers this fact for herself.

:(

“Your first offense was separating me from my fiancée on my wedding day.

Honestly why is everyone up his and jules ass when its their fking wedding day like SHOOO

If Ella were a house, she would be a grand home, one with many rooms and doors, all of which were easily unlocked, flung open. If I were a house, I would be haunted.

Pen game

“Too true,” I say quietly. “There are few, indeed, who’ve ever prioritized my personal happiness. I wouldn’t expect you to be the exception.”

Go off, i know thats right

I stare at the animal. The dirty little creature waited for me outside the war room only to follow me here. I’ve done nothing to inspire its loyalty.

I just had a thought, is this the same dog he met before and fed a danish to?!?!

She lifts a hand when she sees me, the single moment of distraction costing her a fight with a bramble.

This is hilarious and If this aint me tho

Another responding bark. “Good,” I say, and walk away. The dog chases after me so quickly its snout bumps my heels.

Aaron having a convo with this dog is me everyday, literal Taurus behavior

do my work most days surrounded by the ancient hieroglyphics of sticky children; crayon drawings of indecipherable creatures are thumbtacked to the wall above my desk;

I'm actually dead

I hang my jacket on a rack painted in colors of the rainbow, slinging my gun holster around the back of a small yellow chair decorated with handprints. The disturbing dichotomy is not lost on me.

Such a vivid scene that I'm am incredibly grateful for

But today, of all days—a day my mind continues to remind me was meant to be my wedding day—

Baby is spiraling i cant believe she did this to him…like jules what tf

also concerning obfuscations.

Aaron needs to dumb down his language for me asap

More simply: I miss her. I regret even relinquishing the dog.

Literally dogs are so distracting you need to go get him back

it’s not surprising to see people gone; I was only surprised to find myself disappointed.

glad he's starting to appreciate the company? Maybe?

All I’ve wanted for so long was a single moment of quiet, and now that I have it in abundance, I’m not sure I want it.

This is so real sometimes

“He is a dog,” I’d said, frowning as I looked up. “You may call him a dog.”

This is the most Warner response Warner has ever said across the entire series

stare at her by way of hello.

Someone stop this man he shouldnt be out in thw wild lIke this

Do you have any idea how many attempts have been made on Nouria’s life?” Still, I say nothing.

I'm sorry Sam but it is not even remotely close to the shit they dealt with

“Trust me. She and I have had a lot of conversations about this. Juliette doesn’t want to do anything to scare you.

Not a good look for you Jules, you go around and talk all about your relo and Aaron with EVERYONE else, and including your worries about certain things...except for Aaron...who you're actually in the relationship with...

“Yes—you prioritize her safety above all else, to the detriment of the world.

Jules is literally like 18, someone else go do it TF

You’re not the only one who lies awake at night worrying for the safety of their loved ones. I have no sympathy for your pain, or your problems.”

Literally you and Nouria can eat shit.

You’re nothing but a callous, coldhearted narcissist. You don’t care about anyone but yourself. I hope you know how lucky you are that Juliette tolerates your presence.

This is so out of pocket, my chest hurts

“Good night,” I say quietly, and turn to leave. I hear Sam sigh, her regret building as I walk away. “Warner, wait,” she says, calling after me. “I’m sorry—that was over the line— It’s been a long day, I didn’t mean—”

:( FUCK OFF SAM YOU ALREADY SAID IT.

She is relieved to discover me asleep. She is relieved she doesn’t have to speak with me. The pressure in my chest intensifies.

I'm so heartbroken

I drag a hand down my face as I head for the door, faintly aware that I’m still in the clothes I was wearing yesterday. My eyes are dry, my stomach empty, my body exhausted.

I just had a thought, is Juliette perhaps helping build a house for her and Aaron as a surprise? I'm only going this route because she came back smelling like chemicals and everyones been MIA, she's been super exhausted etc...

Even Kenji said he was too tired today to deal with your shit.” I hesitate then.

Aaron knows he's fking up when even Kenji is avoiding him.

I take her into my arms, hitching her leg around my thigh before I kiss her, breaking her open. She’s so soft, slick, and eager in my arms,

I'm hot

She’s soon gasping my name, her hands in my hair, at the back of my neck. She’s already so wet, so ready for me; the sight of her—the taste of her—it’s too much.

Spice like this in this series was never on my bingo card but DAMN

and then she sinks to her knees in front of me, taking me into her mouth— I make a tortured sound, grasping at the wall, hardly able to breathe.

LoRD

confusion, refusing to dry herself off. “But—” I scoop her up without a word and she squeaks, half laughing as I carry her over to the single bed in our room.

My mans is ravenous rn (his fear is that Kenji is gonna knock on the door and interrupt before he gets the tip in)

You think the reason Warner gets all quiet and gives people death stares is because he’s too nice? To say anything?” Winston glances at me. “Him?” I am smiling.

Hahahahhaha

“Yes,” Ella says, refusing to back down. “You guys are too comfortable bullying him.” Winston looks around himself a moment,

I mean thats facts tho IMO Warner has Nesta Archeron syndrome--his self hatred for the things he's done causes him to not stand up for himself bc he himself believes whatever anyone says about him AND THEN doubles down on it. Bc as Nesta has said something along the lines of "No one can hate me more than I hate myself"

“And you,” Winston says, turning to face me, his eyes narrowing with barely suppressed anger. “You agree with this assessment of your character?” I smile wider. “Yes.”

The dog is wearing a stupid bow on his head right now.”

DEAD

Ella has stiffened beside me. “Who’s Yara?” Her faint, almost undetectable note of jealousy—possessiveness—only cements my smile in place.

Yeah that’s what happens when you leave him all the time, girls are obsessed w him

“Stop,” Ella says angrily. “Stop calling him names. He’s not a dickhead. He’s not a jackass. He’s not self-absorbed. I don’t know why you guys think it’s okay to just say whatever terrible things you want about him—to his face—as if he’s made of stone.

I smile at her then, smile so wide I start laughing, disbelief rendering me foreign even to myself. I hardly recognize this sound.

Babyyyy

“I can’t look away. I’m trying to look away and I can’t. It’s like if a baby was born with a full set of teeth.” “Yes! Exactly. It’s exactly like that!” “But nice, too.” “Yeah.” Kenji sighs. “Nice, too.” “Hey, did you know he had dimples?

I CANNOT WITH THESE TWO

I didn’t know he had dimples.” “C’mon, man, that’s old news—”

Oh my godddd

I’m smiling again. Like a common idiot.

Damn between this statement and the dog one im not sure which is more Warner lmao…