twofold process: First, you find words for the speechless terror you felt as a child. You are doing this right now. Reading this book gives you language for the disorganized heartbreak you’ve endured for so long. Second, if you haven’t done so already, it’s time to stop reaching for your mother, rest your weary soul, and grieve what is lost. In order for this to work, you need the company of someone who understands this unique pain and/or a clinician trained in and dedicated to healthy attachment. Your pain emerged from relational trauma, and it will only heal with healthy relational
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