Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance

by Kelly McDaniel

Reclaiming Damaged Dreams and Goals This is a fun and fruitful way to identify your desires and dreams. To start, let’s prime your brain. Think of four of your significant achievements to date. What are you most proud of accomplishing? (For example, abstaining from alcohol or completing an academic program or moving to a new town are all significant achievements.) What are four ways you express creativity? (Planning meals, entertaining friends and family, or creating music and art are just a few ideas.) What gives your life meaning? List four things that get you out of bed in the morning. (Try to think of things that make you smile, like your pet, yoga class, or cup of coffee.) Now your brain is ready for the next part. Think of seven words to describe yourself, such as funny, pretty, resilient, creative. (This is the “self” that feels most like you, not the “self” that worries about what others think.) Think of seven things that you like to do and that give you a sense of purpose and meaning. (Go back to the first three lists if you need ideas.) When you have all fourteen, pick your top three descriptive words. (For example, words to describe yourself might include strong, pretty, persistent, funny, quiet, and intelligent. But now you pick your favorite three, such as (1) funny, (2) persistent, (3) pretty.) Now pick your favorite three activities. (For example, (1) reading, (2) cooking, (3) knitting.) Now it’s time for the finale: let’s operationalize what you have put to...