Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance

by Kelly McDaniel

Psychobiological adaptations to fear brought on by maternal abuse can be long-lasting, complicating relationships for a daughter throughout her life. The NCADV explains how a person who has been through intimate partner abuse will have symptoms long after leaving the relationship. Symptoms of domestic violence include sleep problems; intrusive flashbacks and feelings of terror; avoiding topics or situations that are reminders; feelings of hopelessness, rage, and worthlessness; and panic attacks.20 Daughters with Third-Degree Mother Hunger share these symptoms. They idealize the abuser (their mother), believe they deserve the abuse, and suffer a humiliating loss of self-worth. Some professionals use the term pathological accommodation to describe what happens when a child learns to survive abuse.