Tender with a Twist (Rainbow Cove, #2)

by Annabeth Albert

“Logan. You got a minute?” “What do you want?” I made my voice harsh as possible. “You.”

I wasn’t sure why I did it—more instinct than anything else, but my heart hammered, and suddenly letting him kiss me seemed far riskier than letting him whale on me. His lashes were impossibly long, mouth far lusher than it had any right to be, and the way my stomach clenched, wanting to know what he tasted like, made me nervous. And I didn’t do nervous.

I’d bottom for him if that’s what he had his heart set on, but for whatever reason, I was reluctant to go there with him, same as with the kissing. Some part of me seemed to want to hold back even as the rest of me was chomping at the bit to see what he could offer.

“Kid.” Curtis silenced my rambling with a stern look. No one watching us would ever believe that this guy had been on his knees, willingly—eagerly, even—for me.

I didn’t want a newbie sub. I wanted him. Specifically, I wanted to collapse on the couch with him for some post-sex kissing and touching, but I’d asked for this so I just nodded. Also, I suspected that he liked the praise more than he was letting on—he’d sucked harder each time I’d complimented him and seemed to sink into my gentle touches as much as the harder ones. But I wasn’t going to point that out.

Curtis might not think he wanted praise, gentleness, tasty food, and kisses, but I was going to find a way to work them all into our lessons, sooner rather than later.

I was losing my damn mind. That was the only reason I could see for why I’d agreed to Logan’s little plan, why I’d been on edge last few days, waiting for a text message from him. He’d specifically made sure I could get texts on my phone before we parted on Monday, and now I was checking the damn thing all the time like some teenager with a crush. Which I wasn’t. And to be honest, the kid didn’t really need my help.

Logan would help me set this right. Only trick would be not needing him more than I needed that commission.

Then he did the oddest thing—he dropped kisses down my spine before straightening. Damn. That felt as nice as the soft flogger would, but I needed him to not go getting any romantic ideas.

So I made myself not protest his caring. But I also tried not to like it. It would be only too easy to come to need this. To crave it more than the scene. To come to depend on him would be the stupidest thing I could do, and yet, I still felt myself sinking into the blissful post-session haze, wrapping his affection around me even though it was sure to carry a price.

And I knew I was being a bit of a coward, avoiding the kid, but our last session had rattled me. I’d woken up to him all cuddled my side, and I’d liked it. I’d wanted to stay, and that wouldn’t do. So yeah, I was laying low.

I hated the thought of anyone picking on my— No. Not my guy. Not gonna start down that path.

“Can’t go getting dependent. Soft. I don’t want to start needing something only to have it ripped away,” I admitted. I’d never said that aloud to another soul before, and admitting the fear had me feeling like the air temperature dropped twenty degrees.

He might be my favorite secret, but like I’d told him, I knew all too well the perils of becoming attached. Our eyes caught, gratitude and approval shining in his, God-knew-what in mine. His head tipped against my shoulder, and it would have been so easy to kiss him. Too easy.

I wasn’t only impressed—I was proud. All that power and mastery and he still chose to submit to me. It was more than a little humbling.

I wanted to see him in the worst way. Wanted the release of a scene. Plus, he’d inevitably have food with him, and my winter greens were getting awfully tiresome. But that want was dangerous. It was why I hadn’t gotten together with him since our last scene. I didn’t like how I was coming to crave him. His laugh. His hands, alternately punishing and tender. His praise, which I tried so hard not to need and still felt like a drug.

It was weird—something about being around him made me smile, but I was also far grumpier around him than I was with other people. Even with Nash, I could usually put up a front, not let too much of my true emotions show. But Logan felt different, and that unnerved me.

My chest ached with the force of wanting to be something more than what I was for him.

He rubbed my arm. His sympathy felt both itchy and welcome—a wool sweater on a cold day. It was big and scary, letting him see even that much of my private grief.

Our eyes met, and that further stole my breath, the way he looked at me like I was his whole world, like he had no better purpose than to get me off.

This was Curtis, the guy I liked more than I should have, the guy who made me feel things I’d never really thought possible. And he’d welcomed this from me, wanted this, needed it as much as I had. The thought forced another spasm from me.

Whoa. His lips slid over mine. This was unexpected, and it had been so damn long since I’d been kissed that all I could do was gasp. I maybe could have handled an aggressive I’m-gonna-own-your-ass kiss easier, but while assertive, Logan was painstakingly gentle and cautious. But not timid or fleeting, either. No, this was an exploration. Little slides and sips and sighs, each of which melted another layer of the icy armor I wrapped myself in.

I was too starved for attention like his, too long without kisses. And when he leaned in again for another kiss, I met him eagerly, letting him nip and lick and deepen the kiss to something that revealed how damn hungry I really was.

My chest pinched again at the thought of him in some eco-friendly wood cabin with a big garden and welcoming kitchen and some blessed person to share it with him. It was another reminder that these lessons wouldn’t last forever. He was destined for things other than me, so I might as well enjoy him while I had him.

I’m going to miss you, too. Whenever he finally did return to his fancy Portland life, I’d miss his cooking and his smiles and his homey little place. And fuck, I didn’t want that. The wine turned sour in my gut. I missed enough damn people in my life. I didn’t need to miss him, too. Maybe the only solution was to collect some memories to keep me warm after he left, to try to soak up as much of his sun as I could now.

“You said something about a boot?” Curtis spoke up. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was jealous of the doctor complimenting me, but that was ridiculous. Curtis didn’t do jealous, and it wasn’t like the doctor had been flirting. He just liked my food.

“Why would you want that?” “Someone has to help your grumpy ass.” I kept my voice light even as jumbled thoughts piled up in my head. Why indeed? Because I liked him. Because I worried about him. Because he needed it. Because I liked helping. But mainly because I cared. Way more than I wanted to.

Why did him taking care of me have to feel so damn good? Why did he have to make it so easy to stay? I didn’t know, and that bugged me even as I sank into the welcoming softness of his bed. Sane or not, I wasn’t going anywhere, not any time soon.

For all that I loved kink, I loved that we could be vanilla sometimes, too, enjoy each other’s company that way.

Huh. There was an idea. I let myself imagine that world, one where Logan didn’t move on, didn’t find his ideal sub, didn’t get his big dreams… Nope. Much as I liked that picture for me, liked the idea of bringing him east to the big carving championships and returning next year here with him, I wanted him happy even more. My strongest wish was for him to get everything he wanted. Needed. Deserved. And that wasn’t me. It would be like trying to shove the sun into a cardboard box—he deserved so much more than what I could offer. So I just smiled at Gloria and didn’t say anything.

Fuck. I needed this so bad. Needed things I hadn’t let myself realize until he came along.

Take me. Don’t leave me. Stay. All sorts of words bubbled up in my throat, but I managed to hold them back.

Trust. Tenderness. Appreciation. Lust. They were all there, hanging between us, each look laced with more and more emotion until I couldn’t stop myself from moaning. “Need you. Logan. Need you.”

the depth of emotion there hit me like a punch. He cared. It was there in every touch, every look, every thrust. And damn it, so did I. I wanted good things for him, wanted his pleasure more than my own. I looked away first. I didn’t want this, hadn’t asked for it, yet here we were. And fuck if I knew what to do with it.

I might not know what to do with the emotions rolling around in my chest, but all I knew was that I was no longer strong enough to shove Logan away.

Sorry if he hurt your feelings.” No, you did.

“No. I want to see it a little longer. It’s…magical.” And it really was. The bonfire. This weekend. This man. “We’ll stay, then.” Curtis shocked the stuffing right out of me when he laced our hands together. It was dark and no one was paying us any mind, but it still felt…radical somehow. Like Curtis was flipping off Otis and anyone else who didn’t care for him.

And I’d had him naked, marked his body, done kinky sex, waited weeks for that first kiss, and still this simple act of holding hands threatened to top all of that. This. This is when our story really begins.

Even like this, my whole body lived to serve him, wanted to turn him on, make him happy. He could have asked for anything right then, and I would have tried to make it happen. Harness the moon. Carry the flames. Run the ocean.

He took forever to answer. “I’m not sure there’s really anything to break up.” And with that, my heart shattered, and I dropped his hand. He had another think coming if he thought I was letting him get away with this.

As long I’m there. Was that what I needed to convince Curtis of? That I was there, that I wasn’t going to leave, that his worst fears weren’t going to come true.

Can’t let go. Exactly. I couldn’t let Curtis go. I had to figure out how to stay and fight for us, not run away because my parents wanted it.

“You. Specifically you. I need you. Need your optimism. Your sweetness. The way you take care of me. The way you dominate me. Your kinky side. Your food. I need it all.”

I was so damn lucky to have him. He made me want to try. Made me want to be brave. Made me want to shine like him. We still had a ways to go, but I was bound and determined to do right by him.

I love you. Period. Full stop. But it was too soon to voice that, so I simply kissed him again, harder and deeper. With my lips and tongue, I tried to tell him the truths my voice couldn’t. I’m falling for you. Have been falling from the very start. I need you. I’m never giving you up. He kissed me back with a ferocity that made me think maybe he was hearing what I couldn’t say.

“Yes. I’m yours. Your sub. Your man.” Curtis’s eyes finally fluttered shut, but not before I saw the emotion shining there. My man. It felt like I’d waited forever for him to see himself that way. I wanted that so badly, wanted to believe that he was mine, really mine. My heart. My soul. My man.

Life has had a way of bringing me the people I needed when I most needed them. And now it brought me you. And the way I see it, I’d be stupid to let fear keep us apart.”

Maybe I didn’t know every step of the journey before us, but I knew he was the sun I wanted to follow on the trek. My sun. My second chance. My everything.

“You’re my dream. The one I want to come home to. I love you, Logan.”