Husband Material (London Calling, #2)

by Alexis Hall

"DAVID BLACKWOOD," SAID OLIVER, "WAS a loving husband, a devoted father, and an absolute demon on the golf course. We all remember him as…as.…” He looked down at his cards. “David Blackwood,” said Oliver, “was a loving husband, a devoted father, and…” He looked down again. Then he looked up. And his eyes moved over the crowd, pausing just for a second on me before he fixed his attention back on a neutral point. “David Blackwood,” he said, “was a complicated man, and the last words I said to him were ‘go fuck yourself.’” The nice thing about Oliver’s family being incredibly British and middle class was that nobody had any way to react to that, so everyone stayed very still and very silent. “I wish they had not been,” Oliver went on, “and I suppose that might seem obvious. After all, who wants their last words to their father to be ‘go fuck yourself’? But I think what’s not so obvious is that while I’m sorry he’s dead… I hope no one here would think that I’m not sorry he’s dead. I’m a vegan criminal defence lawyer, for fuck’s sake, neither of which my father approved of, incidentally, but in general I don’t believe death ever solves anything. Another thing my father disapproved of… He was a proponent of bringing back hanging, which he apparently thought would fix knife crime; the economy; and, if I recall from at least one conversation, immigration. “But my point is that although I’m sorry he’s dead—and this might be the part that surprises people, and Mother, in particular,...