At Your Best: How to Get Time, Energy, and Priorities Working in Your Favor

by Carey Nieuwhof

CHAPTER 9 IN A SNAP People tend to be the greatest opportunity and the greatest obstacle. The people who want your time are rarely the people who should have your time. And the people who should get most of your premium time rarely ask you for it. Healthy relationships are mutual. If you spend most of your time with draining people, you’ll live much of your life feeling drained. Spend most of your time with the people who produce most of your results and the least amount of time with the people who don’t. In your personal life, spend 80 percent of your time with the people you care most about, leaving 20 percent for others. The number of relationships people can have is not just a matter of preference or willingness; the limits are cognitive, having to do with the way the brain works. People are hardwired for three to five close friendships, twelve to fifteen friendships, and 150 personal relationships. You were designed to handle between three and 150 relationships in a meaningful way, but social media will pressure you to connect with far more. Despite being designed to handle up to 150 personal relationships, social media pressures you to connect with far more people. People have far better manners than technology does. Messages are always sent at the convenience of the sender, never at the convenience of the recipient. The deepest relationships rightly belong with the closest connections. Stop treating everyone the same, because all relationships aren’t the same. The d...