You're My Home

by Katie Moore

You are who you are, and I love the person you are. If you’re gay, you’ve been gay this whole time, and I loved you then, so I’ll love you now.”

“All I’m saying, Son, is that when it comes to Zach, think before you react and don’t take all the love and trust he gives you for granted. Someday you’ll truly understand the depth and beauty of what he gives you. And what you give him.” His hand moves down over my heart. “You’ve given him a lot of space in here. Take care of your heart, Son, because that boy in the kitchen is most of it.”

When he does things like that, it calms me in a way that nothing else does. Everything is divided in my mind like a river running between the desert and a flowery meadow. Everything before Brady and everything after. Nothing matters before him and everything matters after him. He’s the river that brings life to me. He’s the butterflies and flowers, the sun and the warmth it shines down.

“Because we loved you then, too.” His mom does this humming sound. “He’s right. You walked into our lives, and we knew you were ours even then.”

didn’t do it for you. I did it for Zach and because I wanted to spend time with him,” he says pointedly, clearly not happy with my choice of words.

“He’s gone, baby. I promise you’re safe now. Come back to me… I promise I’ll be right here with you.”

“Zach’s everything that is good in this world, and maybe some people think he needs to grow up or should get used to the bad stuff, but he’s had enough bad stuff for a lifetime. He deals with it in his own way…and that’s by being sensitive to everyone.

He feels things stronger than most, and with that, he needs the happy stuff, or he’ll drown in all the wrong kind of emotions.”

You can’t control people and what they do, only your reaction to their behavior. Don’t give them a single part of you, not even your anger. Feel it for a moment, but then move on. They are of no meaning or value in your life. They only have power if you give it to them, so don’t. It’s over and done with. Learn from it and move on.”

want a relationship with him!” I shout, getting off the bed to pace in front of him. “He’s mine! He’s always been mine!”

“Now that you’ve helped him with his firsts, if he wants to date and find another guy, how are you going to feel about that?” “It’s not happening,” I blurt out. Even the thought of another man touching him, touching him like I have, makes me insane. “Why? If you only wanted firsts, why can’t he move on?” “Because he’s mine!” Dad gives me an understanding look with no judgment lining his face. “He’s always been yours, Brady. More than I think you even realize. Are you sure that you did this to help him with his firsts, or did you do this because the thought of being with Zach in that way was something you wanted?”