Cold Hearted Bastard (The Underworld Kings #1; Underworld Kings)

by Jenika Snow

But fuck, she’d been on my mind for months, and for a man who wasn’t afraid of anything… wanting her terrified the fuck out of me.

I couldn’t help it, because the truth was, for the first time in my miserable fucking existence, I had a weakness… and that was Lina. And, God help her, I didn’t want to be strong.

Am I dead inside? Was this what it meant to only survive, not live?

One day I’d be able to feel safe. One day I’d be able to make a home and be happy. But that day wasn’t today.

I hadn’t admitted it before, hadn’t let it really grow inside me until this very moment, but as I stared into Lina’s horrified eyes, I knew without a doubt I’d burn Desolation—the entire fucking world—if it meant having her as mine. Because I’d never let her go, and the look in her eyes told me she realized it too.

“What are you?” His smile was slow. Evil. He moved a step back, and I sucked in a breath. “I told you.” One. Two. Three seconds. “The bad guy.”

A. Fucking. Look. That’s all it took to go down this rabbit hole where, for the first time in my miserable life, I questioned my very sanity. For the first time in my life, I want something just for me.

“Interesno, kak by vy otreagirovali, yesli by uznali, chto ya skazal im, chto pererezhu im glotku, yesli oni khotya by posmotryat na vas.”

When he reached up and smoothed his thumb along my cheek, I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch. He felt so good, his skin warm, his hand big. “Ya by ubil lyubogo, kto pytalsya zabrat' tebya u menya.”

“He’ll destroy her, Arlo, and I don’t mean end her life in the most humane, painless way possible. He’ll beat her down mentally and emotionally until she’s nothing more than dough that he can form into whatever vision he sees fit. And when he’s the only thing that she can grasp on to, when he has you right where he wants you, he’ll destroy you too.”

“It would be bad form for us to have a personal hand in it. But you’re the best of the best. A real coldhearted bastard, aren’t you? You could take him out and make it look like he just disappeared. Poof,”

“Moye serdtse bolit, kogda ya smotryu na tebya.” His voice was deep and low but still had the intense effect of moving over every inch of my body and lighting it up.

“Dlya tebya ya sdelayu eto bezopasnym.” I almost moaned at the way his deep voice moved over me as he said the Russian words.

He leaned down and started kissing me deeply. “So sweet.” Arlo was breathing so hard. “S toboy ya teryayu kontrol.”

“Addicting. I'll never get enough.” He sucked at my opening, and I moaned. “I’ll need to have my face buried between these pretty pale thighs every fucking night just to get my fix.”

“Ya ub'yu lyubogo, kto popytayetsya zabrat' tebya u menya.” “You’ve said that before. What does it mean?” He was silent for long moments, and I could imagine he was trying to think of a lie, but what he uttered told me it was the absolute truth. “It means… I'll kill anyone who tries to take you from me.”

“It means ‘my light.’ That’s what you are to me, Galina. You’re my light in all the darkness that surrounds me.”

Come here and let me consume you like you’ve already done to me. Let me ruin you as much as you’ve caused every part of me to crumble to the gritty floor.

She’d never be safer than when she was with me. I was a strong man. An evil man. But for her, I wished I was good and gentle. I wished I could be someone else entirely.

“But whatever can grow in this dark, dead heart of mine, whatever love I am capable of, I want you to own it. I want you to be the only person to have that part of me, moy svet.” “Arlo—” “I want to give you everything that I am, Galina. I want to give you the bad, the good… even the parts that are terrifying, because that’s what’s real; that’s who I am.”

“Ya nikogda ne znal, chto znachit byt' zhivym, prezhde chem ty byl moim.”