Hell of a Book

by Jason Mott

“So that’s it. Everything’s fixed now, right?” “That’s a dangerous word.” “. . . But isn’t that what we all want? To believe that everything’s fixed?” “What if it wasn’t ‘fixed’? What if you could only hope to help?” “Well, that’s anticlimactic.” “But it’s real. And reality is something you continue to struggle with.” “. . . What if it doesn’t help? None of it. What if I screamed and shook my fists at the heavens, only to have my voice swallowed up? Only to still be invisible.” “Then at least you said something. Even if you had to use someone else’s voice to do it.” “. . .” “Have you noticed that, throughout all of this, you still haven’t used his name? His real name, I mean. Or your own, for that matter.” “Maybe next time.” “Why?” “Names would just make it true. All of it. Not just true, but real. I’m not sure we can let it be real. I’m not sure we could face that reality.” “‘. . . We?’ What else could we do?”