Crash & Carnage (Tarnished Angels Motorcycle Club, #2)

by Emma Slate

“I almost died?” “Yes.” “Fuck,” he murmured. “That’s—I don’t even—okay then. That was not how I expected to go out.” “Go out?” “Die,” he stated. “Dying on an operating table? In a hospital gown? Fucking pathetic.” I wasn’t sure what to say to comfort him. It was like he was taking it as a personal insult. But death was death and none of us got to choose how our time came to an end.

My eyes followed her, and then I looked back at my patient, lying there, appearing too smug for his own good. “Jealousy looks good on you, Doc.”

“Give you a chance?” I arched a brow. “Give you a chance to do what, exactly?” “Buy you an ice cream soda and ask you to wear my letterman jacket, of course. And if you’re really nice to me, I’ll even take you to the sock hop.”

“Doc?” I looked behind me. “Think about it.” “Think about what?” He grinned. “Me. Naked. I’ve got tattoos you haven’t even seen yet.” “You’re incorrigible.” He reached for my yogurt. “You’re already thinking about it. I know it.”

Even though he was moving slowly, I detected a hint of natural swagger, like an eighteenth-century pirate hell-bent on destruction and damnation.

He trekked into the kitchen and pointed to the Italian espresso machine. “What the ever-loving fuck is that?”

I laughed. “I wouldn’t have known what to do with a guy like you back in high school.” “Darlin’,” he drawled. “You don’t know what to do with a man like me now.” No truer statement had been uttered between us.

“Maybe you need to be challenged.” “Why? I like that I can do my job on autopilot. We’re not all driven to become doctors.”

“You must be good at hitting the books.” He grinned. “Bet you love libraries.” “How did you know?” I teased. “You sniff books, don’t you?” “I might.”

“Give a man a reason to dream.” “You don’t want to dream. You want spank bank material.” “You’ve got a dirty mouth, Doc.” His grin was wicked. “I never would’ve guessed…but I like it. I like it a lot.”

I booked it to the elevator, wondering why it felt like he lived by the mantra keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.

I changed out of my dress, throwing it in the laundry basket. I’d never wear it again. Every time I looked at it, I’d remember this night, this shame.

“The way he watched you. Like he couldn’t take his eyes off you. Like he was hungry, starving.” I rolled my eyes. “Lust, you mean.” She shook her head. “No. Hungry for something he couldn’t name.”

“There’s never enough time when you find the person you’re supposed to be with. So, if you have a shot in hell of finding someone real, someone meaningful, someone that gets inside of you and lights you up, then embrace it. And who fucking cares how it looks. You get one life, Linden. Don’t waste it.”

“This is insane,” I whispered. He nodded. “We haven’t known each other that long.” He nodded again. “You’re a criminal.” He shrugged. “I’m a basket case.” He nodded vigorously.

“I wouldn’t jump through any of those kinds of hoops. That’s why I never joined a sorority.” He looked at me. “You didn’t join a sorority?” “Nope.” “You seem the sorority girl type, Doc.” “I don’t know if I should be insulted by that statement or not.”

I thought about my future. For the first time in years, I thought there might be an added purpose to my life.

“We’re all broken in some way. If you’re lucky, you might find someone whose broken pieces fit with yours.”

You have to take risks, because if you don’t, then you’ll wake up at the end of your life full of regrets, and a head full of dreams never lived, and that’s a lot worse than dying.”

“Hey, Doc. You don’t have to worry about a thing. Okay?” “I’m not good at living in the moment, Boxer.” He grinned. “I’ll help you.”

There’s something so beautiful about seeing a burly, tatted man cradling an infant.”

“It reminds me of the house in It’s a Wonderful Life,” Joni said, brushing a kiss to Zip’s cheek. “Full of possibilities. We get to make it our own, which I love. But it feels like… I don’t know. It’s a home, right? But this house was here before us. It’ll be here after us. We’re just caretakers for a period in its life.”

Their curiosity would not get in the way of their safety, and it became clear this was in fact still a ghost town. People didn’t live here, they survived here.

It’s such a lovely reminder of the fact that no matter how much they want to die, their hearts betray them and beat on, pumping life through their veins against their will in the worst moments of their existence. Is there anything more beautiful than betrayal? I don’t think so. I have several

If I had any hope of surviving this, I had to become something else. Something ruthless, feral, and angry. Something powerful. Someone in control.

I leaned my head back against the pillow, my eyes slowly drifting shut. The animal kingdom show had switched focus to a pack of lions killing one of their own. I appreciated the gruesome picture. I even felt a kinship with it.

And that, in and of itself, is the reason I’m contemplating a morphine addiction.”

“I’m not the same person that I was. He took so much from me, Boxer.” “Are you afraid I won’t love you?” I flinched. “I love you. Any and all parts of you. I love who you were, and I love who you are now.” “I don’t know who that is.”

“Regrets are a waste of time, aren’t they?” “Damn right they are,” he agreed.

I didn’t used to enjoy romantic comedies, but now I realized how much the world needed them. The lightness, the laughter, the happily ever after. Life so rarely looked the way you thought it was going to. But in cinema, in the world of love, everything always worked out. It was a beautiful lesson to remember—that sometimes, some dreams really did come true.

“I don’t like the idea of marriage in the general sense,” I said slowly, looking up to meet his eyes. “But I kind of like the idea of marriage to you.” He smiled. “Is that a proposal?” I snorted and pulled away. “No.” “I accept.”

“Thanks. It feels stupid, though. You know? Because there are so many other more important things going on now.” “Matters of the heart are important too,” Allison said. “Even when the world is falling apart?” I asked quietly. “Even then,” she assured me.

“To remind you that sometimes life is shit, but shit is just manure, and beautiful things can grow in manure.”

“So, you’re gonna marry me, right? And make an honest man out of me?” Boxer asked. “I’m tired of giving away the milk for free.” I sat up and grinned. “I don’t know. I kind of like living in sin.” “What will we tell our dog?” “What dog?” “The dog we’re gonna adopt together. I want him to know his parents are in a loving, committed relationship.” I snorted. “Yeah, okay, I’ll marry you. For the dog’s sake.”