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A man cannot destroy the savage in him by denying its impulses. The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
It’s just a game. I won’t hurt her. It was like tag or hide-and-seek as a kid. We knew nothing bad would happen when we got caught and we’d bring no harm when we chased, but the irrational fear excited us anyway. That was what I liked. That’s all it was. This wasn’t real.
detectives we hired to find him and keep tabs on his whereabouts hadn’t been able to locate him. Which explained why Michael wanted to take measures to keep Rika out of the limelight, where such a grand wedding in our affluent, seaside hometown would put her.
My friends were simply mine. That was it. They were separate from what happened at home, in class, or even in my head sometimes. That’s what I liked about them. When we were together, we were a planet.
“She’s young, healthy . . . What more do you need to know? She’ll please you.” I laughed quietly. Jesus Christ. “It takes a lot to please me,” I taunted. “Remember?”
“Say it,” he whispered. “Say what?” “That you only want me.”
“I wish you knew how much I want you to have everything. You deserve everything, you know that, right?” I just stare at her, my eyes starting to water. My mom is a mess, she doesn’t always put me first, and I hate the positions I’m put in sometimes, but . . . I know she loves me. Not that it always feels like enough, but I know she tries.
And eight days later, he shows up on my mother’s doorstep. He hands her nine thousand four hundred sixty-two dollars, a Rolex, and some emerald earrings. And he takes me home with him.
It could be so strange how things happen. How the people you never suspect become your only lifeline, and you hold on to them as hard as you can, because you have no choice.
“Hey, it’s not the label on the jeans but what’s inside that matters.”
“I love that he saw us that night,” he went on, his voice almost a growl. “Loved that furious look on his fucking face when he saw you all over me.”
“There’s something about you, kid,” he said, still watching the road ahead. “I don’t know what it is, but most of the time, teaching those classes, meeting with contractors, talking to my friends, shit . . .” He shook his head. “I can barely stand it. I even have trouble chewing my goddamn food most of the time.” And then he looked over at me, shifting into fifth. “But not around you. Around you, I get hungry. Like I’m starving.”
“Keep looking at me like that,” Kai spoke up, “and we’re going to have problems.”
“Old enough to have seen and heard worse,” I told him. And he stopped mid-step. A shot of thrill swelled in my throat, and my legs burned with the urge to run.
“I only want you,” I breathed over his mouth, our soft lips taunting each other. “It’s not like that with him. I only talk to you.”
“Fuck me,” I breathed out. “Chase me, steal me, and fuck me. Hide me, I don’t care.”
“Mine,” he groaned.
like chasing you,” he said, a hint of a smile on his lips. “I like our foreplay.” I nodded. “I like it, too.” “Hide with me, then?” Hide from my brother? Hide from David, Lev, and Ilia and sneak around with Kai? I nodded again. “Okay.”
“No matter how you cover yourself, it’s never enough. You’re beautiful.”
“Did it ever occur to you that all you would have to do is ask?”
“You can’t, can you? You won’t ask me for anything.” She dropped her eyes, her chest caving. “Do you love him?” I asked. “Yes.”
Just letting it take us over.
“Fuck Damon.” I slammed her back into the wall, lifting her up and grinding my dick between her legs. “This is you and me.”
Out of all the women, my mind always found her.
She underestimated me, but she wouldn’t forget this. That I
“Hurt me. Do what you want with me,” he gasped in my ear. “I deserve it.” He brought his legs up between mine, bending them at the knee and spreading my own. His hand slipped between my legs, and I cried out, suddenly afraid, but he stopped and just rested there, unmoving as he held me in his palm. “Kai!” I yelled, fighting him. His lips stopped on my cheek, breathing hard and hot. “Not tonight.” What? “I’m not Kai,” he said, “and you’re not Banks.” There was something pleading in his voice that gave me pause.
“You’re the girl I didn’t know, and we could be anyone in that confessional. Everything else fell away. Everything. We could hide and fuck with the world in that little room. It was just us.”
We were back in the confessional. We were younger, and it was no one but us. Tucked away, safe.
“No one sees us,” he breathed out. “There’s no one but you
People will think what they want to think, not because they believe they are right, but because it’s in their nature to maintain that they are. By defending yourself, you feed the appetite for drama. By not, you’ve ended the conversation. You. Not them.
“You make me feel driven. You make me hungry and on fire and wanting to slow down time instead of wanting to rush through it. It’s you I look for when I walk in the doors in the morning. Not her. You.”
“Come on, baby,” he begged. “Just reach out.”
“I’m scared,” I whispered. “I’m scared of you even with your mask off.” Because of everything you make me feel.
“I love you guys,” Michael said, “but are you fucking dense? You’re my friends. She is everything. Maybe someday you’ll know what the fuck I’m talking about.”
“Well, good. Happy to hear it, because I’m the only man whose attention you should be trying to get, and baby, you got it years ago while wearing another man’s clothes.” He kissed my temple, his hot breath sending chills down my spine. “So, you can imagine how fucking beautiful you are to me right now wearing mine.”
“I like you, little one.” I smiled, hating that stupid nickname as much as when he called me “kid.” “I like you, too.” I love you.
“I wanted this,” I told her, looking in her eyes. She paused. “For no other reason than I wanted you.” I threaded my fingers through hers, brushing against the band on her finger. I’d get her an engagement ring next week. Even though we were never engaged. Maybe she’d like to pick it out, actually. “Damon knew what a treasure you were, and he loves you. But he won’t keep me from you.” I tipped up her chin to meet my eyes. “This isn’t about him or the hotel or your father. I want you.” “And if I don’t want you?” My gaze faltered, but I decided to be direct. “Don’t you?” I hadn’t misread
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Kai grabbed me, wrapping his arms around my torso, under my arms, and lifting me up. “I love you,” he whispered against my lips as he backed us away from the others. “And he can send me to prison again for a very long time. I’m not letting that happen now that I’ve found you. Please.”
“I love you, too.”
