Despite their differences, Shannon, Wally, and John had a lot in common that they didn’t have in common with me: They were grandparents in their forties. (I gave birth to my daughter at forty-two.) They smoked or chewed some form of tobacco. (No one in my social circle did.) John and Wally were both proud gun owners, like the men in Shannon’s life. (I didn’t know a single person in Cambridge who owned a gun that shot anything but glue.) They lived within miles of Indianapolis, the city where they were born, and saw their siblings, their adult children, and their parents regularly. (I lived far
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