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His plan wasn’t to ruin us. It was to torture. For however long it entertained him to do so.
D
He made himself the cure, which wouldn’t have been necessary if he hadn’t also created the disease. I hated him. My sister’s new husband was the only man I thought I might kill someday.
D
I knew I was fucked up. I just didn’t care. As long as I was happy, I didn’t explain myself to anyone.
I think i know too
Life felt like hell because we expected it to feel like heaven. The quote I read years ago went something like that, but I never understood it. When you’re in the thick all your life, living in ways you eventually figure out no one else is, you learn to sleep well in heat and eat fire. Until one day it’s all you need.
Gritting my teeth, I dug out my phone, swiped the screen, and held it to my ear. “Fuck off.” “Well, top of the fucking morning to you, grouch,” Will said. “What’s your problem?” I swallowed again, raising my eyes to the prize once more. “Nothing my dick can’t solve if you leave me alone for ten minutes,” I told him, staring at her. “What do you want?” “To make you smile.”
Bestie things
Will, Michael, and Kai were my friends, and I’d walk through fire for any one of them. Will was the only one, though, who I was sure would walk through fire for me.
Aw
People assumed I behaved strictly on impulse, when actually, it required quite a bit of strategy to be this fucked up.
I knew all about her little romp in the steam room at Hunter-Bailey with Michael and Kai.
It was actually me dummy
“There are no choices. We are who we are, and we do what we do. It’s nature. Like a game piece, I will play my part because I can’t resist. I can’t be what I’m not.”
D
didn’t like anyone else taunting her. And I really didn’t like another man coming to her rescue, even if it was Will.
D
When we were eight and eleven, it didn’t seem complicated to want to know each other, but now it was. People would read it wrong.
D
“Aw, jealous?” he teased. But then a look passed between us, and I wasn’t fucking laughing. His cocky smile started to fall, and he straightened up. Will was my best friend, and what was mine was mine. He knew that.
Ahem
“Not every woman in this world will be for your personal amusement,” he bit out, staring down at me. “Someday one of them will be your kid, and you’re gonna damn well worry when she’s drawing the wrong kind of attention.”
“You teach your daughter to hide in everyone else’s world,” I shot back, “and I’ll teach mine everyone else exists in hers. Go fuck yourself, and leave the kid alone.”
Kai and I weren’t friends. We were brothers. In every way except biologically. Whether we liked each other or not, we were family, and we had each other’s backs. But that didn’t mean we liked each other, either.
D
You’re a little . . . visible . . . through your shirt, he’d stammered in my ear. He wasn’t unkind about it, but it was still embarrassing. I resisted the urge to fold my arms over my chest and instead tried to be casual about it and act like it wasn’t a big deal. I’d felt my nipples even through my bras from time to time. It couldn’t always be helped. It was nice how he’d offered me the sweatshirt, though. Sweet, really.
That's my man:)
He moved in, his shirt brushing my arms. “Because I can’t feel guilt, sadness, anger, or shame as strongly as I can feel fear anymore, and there’s no stronger fear than when I scare myself.” He brushed a tear off my face, and I jerked away. “I never know quite what I’ll do,” he finished.
D
In fact, he was kind of an angel at the end. An angel with really black bat wings. Psycho.
D
It was the same smile she gave me when we would do all the childish shit my friends were too cool to do with me in high school. Sneaking into movies without paying. Playing tag in the rain in the maze. Midnight drives way over the speed limit on a school night, because we just needed to get out of the house.
:))))))
Kai must’ve gotten her a proper ring after their quick nuptials. Fucking Kai. He’d clearly treated her how she deserved.
As he should
were only a few feet from each other, but all of a sudden, it felt like miles. I’d nearly killed my friend. I’d destroyed Kai’s business. I’d threatened her, had her guarded, and kept her practically caged. I was sorry for some things, not for others.
D
“I have a way . . . with women,” he teased. “I remember.” I licked my lips. “You were fun to watch.”
His breathing turned shallow, and I knew he was remembering all the shit we got up to back in the day. We had some fun. Even without girls.
“Oh, I remember this,” I taunted in his ear, every inch of my chest pressed against his back and both us very aware of my groin on his ass. “This is what you really missed, isn’t it?” He jerked his head back, trying to head butt me. “Don’t fucking talk about that,” he growled. “I was drunk.” “All three times?” I teased, smiling. “Michael and Kai don’t know how close we got, do they?”
He was as guilty as sin. No one knew the real tragedy, though. It wasn’t a matter of why he was different with me, but rather, now . . . I was different because of him.
What if he was watching me right now? He could be in my room, feet away, at this very moment.
You never know
A psycho with a penchant for blind girls who can’t pick him out of a lineup. Was I out of my mind?
D
I could go back to the house right now. I could go to bed with my music and audiobooks and my quiet
D
house while the world continued to spin around me, and the next time I was given a chance to do something wild, stupid, and scary, it would be even easier to turn tail and run . . . Every day just as predictable as the last. This was stupid. And illegal. But he was fun. I didn’t want it to be over.
D
“I scared you.” “Not an emotion I’m used to being on the receiving end of,” he mused.
D
“I can fuck my beautiful fiancée anytime I want,” he went on, “and she looks really amazing dressed only in that quarter-of-a-million-dollar necklace around her neck right now. A necklace I bought without asking my daddy for the money.”
Best lines
Kai looked at me, his dark eyes only a shade lighter than mine. “Banks loves you,” he said. “And we would never disinvite the Ashbys. Those are the only reasons you’re here. You burned down my dojo, you tried to kill us, and you’re not to be trusted around Rika. We’re not friends, so when we run into each other, we’ll keep it brief and civil for the women’s sake, but I’m not ready to pretend anything is okay.” “Everything okay?” Arion popped
Can this bitch go away
kind of wanting to kill myself for a second, too. The shit that came out of my mouth.
Me every single fucking day
I’m dedicating this to my sister’s new husband.”
Exuse me
I shot my eyes over to Michael and Kai standing next to each other, both of them laughing and sharing words, enjoying this too much. Michael looked up at me, grinning like he won something, and Kai followed his gaze, laughing again. Winter publicly slighted me, and everyone was loving it.
Good lol
“The only thing you’re proof of is that not all males grow up to be men.”
I love books
“Maybe his heart already belongs to someone he can’t have,” Claudia said.
Hmm
“If you ever fall for one of them, make it Will or Kai, got it?” Noah said over
Yessir
Boys grew up. He hadn’t.
Ooooo
me. “If I hear anyone touched you, I will crack his fucking skull.”
Yum
didn’t know if he was warming to Damon or hiding in fear.
If the dog dies or gets hurt i'm dnfing this book
“Keep the necklace on,” I heard Michael say. “Just the necklace.”
Oh good god
The bed creaked, moans and breathing followed, and I shook my head, wishing I was deaf instead. They were fighting. While they were having sex. It was weird.
I would too jn that moment
“You need to get fucked and bad,” he told me. “If you don’t want him to do it, I will.” Then he leaned in, whispering over my mouth. “And I would make
Ooo yes please
feel you. I feel you everywhere. The cloves on his clothes, the fountain on his skin. The words on his tongue, the breath on his lips. The hand on my neck, the sharp in his silence. Down the hall. Sitting in the study. Outside in the rain. At the open bathroom door. Or right in the corner of the room. Right here. Watching me. He was always coming. Or . . . Maybe I never left. His words came back to me.
Ahhhh
When he was in prison, he was here. When I wanted to want other men, he was here. When I danced, when I cried, whenever I was alone, and when I was quiet in a room full of people and thinking about him, he was here. The truth was, I’d had what Michael and Rika had. I thought I had anyway. Those days were when I was the happiest. Even though it was a lie, it was the best I’d ever felt. Damon.
Creepy
The control. The memories. The knowledge that our bodies betray us, and it was the brain that was the prize. That the mind knew what we really wanted, not the body.
Is this smart?
“Kom-yen ya!”
Look this up
Don’t ever drink an alcoholic drink you didn’t make or open yourself.
Good mam
I’d rolled through the past two years, watching her from a distance, knowing that she would be my heroin and knowing that my obsession was a no-win situation when I got to her again.
He loves her
