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“Crippling is a bit much. I like to think I’m sort of dabbling in depression.”
relatable
Dev orders the crab eggs
Listen I know this sentence continues but my brain short circuited after reading crab eggs and refused to read further until it comprehended ordering crab eggs at a restaurant - do crabs even lay eggs? Anyway it was eggs Benedict, moving on.
Ryan looks like a pirate who is going to try to upsell you rental car insurance,
What a BURN
Charlie watches his white T-shirt ride up and his cargo shorts strain against his backside as he pulls the bottle down.
And he thinks he’s straight, Charlie my dude, my bro, you’re so unstraight it’s not even funny
Charlie inhales and tries to place the scent before he realizes… it’s just Dev’s skin. Then he realizes he’s smelling Dev and should probably stop.
fellas is it gay to- *gunshots*
“You know you still deserve to have this love story. Right?” Charlie swallows a weird lump forming in the back of his throat. Dev’s fingers are still resting in his hair, and Charlie looks up. “You deserve love,” Dev says again, “and I honestly think Angie and Daphne are both good fits for you. I think both of them will love you, Charlie. Just as you are.” Dev steps back. Charlie closes his legs. “Angie and Daphne,” he repeats. Dev nods. “Oh, yeah. It’s definitely going to come down to the two of them. So, breakfast burritos?” Charlie tries to smile. “Breakfast burritos.”
I will punch them both in the head!!!!
Daphne: [Close-up of her staring down at Angie’s hand on her thigh.] You’ve dated… women? Angie: What, they don’t have bisexuals on the Georgia pageant circuit? Maureen’s note to editors: Cut this entire scene and replace it with the one of Megan and Delilah shit-talking the other women in the hot tub.
Fuck OFF Maureen let these 2 thrive
The way he feels when Dev touches his hair, the way he feels when Dev touches his hand, the way he feels every single time this man touches him. Those feelings didn’t make sense because he’s never felt them before. Now they make perfect sense, and God—he wishes he could go back to his ignorance.
AAAAAAAA
Because things were fine before, when he was not feeling things, when all his feelings were stashed away, unexamined.
Ooof right in the relatable
And Charlie decides, just this once. Just to get rid of these feelings before they devour him.
🫣
He imagines Dev beside him—Dev’s hand instead of his own—and that’s all it takes to send him over the edge. He shoves his mouth into the crook of his left elbow, so he doesn’t make a sound.
😳😳🫣🫣
Dev grabs another handful of white cheddar popcorn and resumes his anxious pacing.
If they don’t stop talking about white cheddar popcorn I’m going to buy some to see what the big deal is
“Hey, Daphne, I was wondering,” Megan says as she stomps over in a dress clearly inspired by Maleficent. The wardrobe department is not subtle. “Are you going to ask Charlie to dance at the ball, or are you hoping Angie asks you instead?” Daphne turns the same color pink as her Sleeping Beauty gown, and Angie throws a French fry at Megan. “Fuck off, you homophobic twat.”
The side sapphics are at it again and I’m so here for it
Quite predictably, it’s a shitshow.
Simply mutiny against Maureen
“What the hell, Charlie?” He grabs tighter to the front of Dev’s jacket. He’s not sure what to say. He says, “Can I please kiss you?”
AAAEEEEEE
as Dev’s body dissolves at the touch, his mind gets stuck on an important thought: Charlie hates kissing. Charlie hates kissing, so why is he kissing Dev like his whole life depends on it? Charlie is straight, so why would he want to kiss Dev? Charlie is Charlie—beautiful, brilliant, carefully guarded Charlie—so why would he want to kiss Dev?
TTHE MAN HAS YOU PINNED AGAINST A WALL AND IS KISSING YOU LIKE THE WORLD IS ABOUT TO END AND YOU STILL THINK HES STRAIGHT
They’re pretending the kiss never happened. Or at least Dev is pretending. Charlie couldn’t draw a timeline of Sunday night if his life depended on it, so he has no idea he grabbed Dev’s waist and said those words. Can I please kiss you? Which is fine. It’s better than fine, actually. It’s great. If Charlie remembered the kiss, Dev would be fired by now.
HE DOES REMEMBER IT YOU OBTUSE PIENAPPLE
Charlie fucking remembers.
*elmo_fire.gif*
He stares down at Charlie as he straddles him. “Is this okay?” Dev asks. “Um, for practice purposes?” “Yeah.” Charlie’s voice trembles. “Okay.” Dev scrapes his fingers through Charlie’s damp hair. “Is this okay?” Charlie swallows. “Definitely okay.”
Fellas is it gay to have gay relations with your gay handler for ‘practice’
“It’s okay to create boundaries with the women, and it’s also okay to ask for what you want.” “I want…” Charlie starts, inhales sharply. “I want to take your shirt off, please,” he declares with perfect politeness. Charlie starts to remove Dev’s shirt, but he does it so clumsily, it’s like he’s never taken off an article of clothing before. “You could help instead of laughing at me,” Charlie suggests. “I literally cannot. You realize my arm is stuck, yes?” Then the shirt’s gone, and Charlie is staring at Dev’s neck, his collarbone, his stomach. Dev stops laughing. “You’re so fucking
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BRO HES LITERALLY- STOP TALKING ABT WOMEN HE WANTS YOU, A NOT WOMEN
He takes three more deep breaths before he can say it, and still, it comes out as a question. “I maybe, sort of, have feelings for Dev? And, like, maybe kissed him?” “Oh my God, really?” she asks in a monotone. “I am totally shocked by this unexpected revelation.”
Parisa ily
He cringes. “I don’t know if the specific label is important to me.”
The way Charlie resonates with me sm
“Dev doesn’t have depression,” he corrects. “Take it from someone who has been in a committed relationship with Lexapro and cognitive behavioral therapy since she was eighteen,” Parisa says, “your handler is in the midst of a major depressive episode.” Charlie shakes his head. She’s wrong. Dev doesn’t struggle with his mental health. Dev is Dev. He’s always happy, always smiling, always thinking about other people. He usually thrives on set, fluttering around to everyone, helping and chatting and feeding off the energy of it all. He’s the most charming person Charlie’s ever met. That’s not the
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This whole bit, I want to highlight this whole book.
Charlie begins to gather Dev up and pull him up onto his chest. “Do you want to be on top?” Dev opens his mouth to retort. “Oh, shut up, I heard it,” Charlie snipes as he wraps his arms tighter around his shoulders.
King of saying the wrong thing
“I’m not afraid of anything. Except emotional intimacy and abandonment.”
LMAO SAME
Dev collapses onto a rock. “I know, goddamn you!” He screams in agony, takes off a shoe, and throws it into a king protea bush. “Okay, you are not Reese Witherspoon in Wild.”
eeeeyyy wild reference
Practice sex. God, that will sound terrible in the legal briefings.
YES IT WILL, HAVE NON PRACTICE SEX
“I could never be with someone who isn’t healthy, Dev.” “You’re not with me,” Dev snaps. “This is all just practice.”
Screaming crying throwing up
“You know what, Dev,” he says, and he fails in his chief mission of not crying in front of him. “For someone who claims to love love, you’re really good at pushing it away.” Then he turns and heads down the last flight of steps, knowing Dev isn’t going to follow.
I’m so
“Poor Wayan was still standing right there, holding the massage oil. I’m pretty sure she got an eyeful of my dick.” “Charles, I got an eyeful of your dick,” Skylar clarifies. “Can we all please appreciate the fact that Charlie just said the word dick out loud without hyperventilating?” Dev says, and he raises his soda water into the air to toast. “To corrupting Charlie!” “Hear, hear.”
Hear hear!
“Are you going to choose Daphne? Of course you’re going to choose Daphne. It’s what we’ve been planning all season. It’s going to be such a boring and predictable season.” “If I had it my way, Sky, it would be neither boring nor predictable.”
No he’s going to pick dev and kiss him right on the mouth
“I think you have to decide if you love him enough right now to try for forever.”
FUCK YEAH SKYLAR
Charlie pulls Dev’s face down so he can kiss his tear stained cheeks. “I love you because you try to understand my brain even though you’re terrible at being patient, and because you’re passionate about the stupidest things, and because you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. I love how you make me laugh. I love your ugly cargo shorts, and I love how cranky you get when you’re hungry, and I love how stubborn you are, and I don’t love you despite those things. I love you because of those things.”
It’s 4am and I’m crying my dudes
