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Ari points out, because for some reason, other people’s problems always seem obviously fixable.
The left side of her mouth curves into a tiny smile, forming a dimple. He hadn’t noticed before that she has the kind of hazel eyes that seem to change color depending on the time of day. Josh finds himself taking new mental snapshots to augment the ones that have stubbornly refused to fade.
“You pick out items that are normal on their own but could be sexual in the right context. When you buy them together, it looks like you’re preparing for a low-budget kink scene. Like”—she squeezes her eyes shut for a moment—“clothespins and a jump rope.” “No.” “Yes,” she insists. “I challenge you to a pervertables duel. Hamilton versus Burr.”
“I-I’m not even sure I wanted to get married. I did it for her. She wanted that official commitment. Somebody loved me and I was finally on the inside of this circle.” Her breathing stutters and the sentences come out in a torrent. “I tried to be what she w-wanted because it felt so good when she was happy with me. All that bullshit about anarchy and demolishing hierarchy had nothing to do with it. She just didn’t want me anymore.” She chokes on a sob. “I hate myself for it. I’m s-so lonely and I don’t want to cry about it because if I let myself cry, I won’t stop. I know i-it wasn’t working,
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Maybe there’s no such thing as soulmates. Maybe there are only people who trust each other enough to begin something without being assured of the end.