To disarm; to perceive, if dimly, a perspective different from your own; to credit that perspective with testimony even when it went against you, even when you couldn’t see it yourself; to yield to another’s narrative; to own up to your share of obstruction, self-destruction, casual cruelty; to see yourself clearly, as another might, in the context of your blind and busy life, your ambitions, your defenses; to accept, however innocently and belatedly, your culpability in the degradations of the moment, the petty fights, the squandered nights; to mature, to dawn to facts, to move beyond denial,
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