Listen Like You Mean It: Reclaiming the Lost Art of True Connection

by Ximena Vengoechea

In some cases, it may be necessary to be explicit about why you are redirecting. If we are comfortable with our conversation partner or if we do not fear reprimand, it can be more productive to let them know why we are redirecting, especially if our conversation partner has crossed a moral or ethical line, or overstepped a boundary. Try, for instance: I’m not comfortable with where this conversation is going. Let’s look at . . . instead. This conversation is getting out of hand, and I feel compelled to step in. I recommend we shift to . . . instead. This is totally unprofessional and uncalled for. A better subject would be . . . It seems like we are getting ourselves unnecessarily riled up. Why don’t we talk about . . . instead.