I’ve never been overpowered like this. I usually fight to maintain control. But with Ivan, I don’t want to fight. I don’t want to struggle. I let myself be swept away by him, consumed by him. I don’t feel frightened or confined. Paradoxically, it’s freeing in a way I’ve never experienced before. For once I don’t have to plan or take action. All I have to do is go along with it, experience it.
