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February 25 - February 25, 2021
I can feel the panic and anxiety leaving his body and sadness creeps into my chest. I don’t want to let him go, but I’m glad that he’s calming and his anguish is dissipating if only for a while.
She calms him
“Why do you come here?” His voice isn’t any gentler, but it’s barely audible. My eyes meet his one more time before I walk out the door. “Because you need me to.”
I might hate her, hate what she let happen, but she’s still mine and he better not fucking touch her.
I hate when I feel overwhelmed like this that the only thing I want to do is see Everly.
I miss the way her damn hair got all over my truck, and the way she rolled her eyes when I complained about it. I miss the way she would excitedly say my name when she had something important to tell me. I’ll never forget the way her body curled into mine on the nights she slept over in my room. It takes everything in me not to drag her back to my room every night that I have to sleep without her.
she’s had my attention from the first time I saw her sprawled across Darcey’s bed, her green eyes scrunching closed with laughter while my sister chewed me out for my attitude. I wanted her in that instant and I’ve never stopped, not even in my worst moment.
I treat her like trash because I’m so fucking angry at her, but I can’t think about her moving on with someone else. She’s mine. I need her. My stomach tightens when I remember the way I treated her last weekend. Every time someone calls her and tells her I need her, she shows up without a question. I take the comfort that I need from her and give her nothing but anger in return.
I hate to read, and I would pretend like I didn’t want anything to do with the books she rattled on and on about. But one of my favorite things to do was lie in bed with her while she read.
Because whether I would ever admit that to her or not, that’s what she was to me. My entire fucking universe.
She’s strength and softness that I could get lost in.
The intense feelings of possession and protectiveness I feel for her are overwhelming, but I never want it to deplete. It keeps me alive, she keeps me alive.
Just because I can’t trust her, and just because we’re not together anymore, doesn’t mean I’ll let anything happen to her.
“Tell me to leave because I’m not good enough to do it on my own,”
“I’ll always be yours, Patrick. Even when you don’t want me to be, I’m still yours.”
Patrick doesn’t let his guard down with anyone, and the fact that he does with me is the biggest compliment I could ever receive.
“Because Patrick, she loved him. She loved him the way I love you. Blindly and completely. To her, nothing else mattered, even if it hurt her in the end.”
“You think I’m a liar and a cheater when all I’ve done is love you.”
“But if you think that you’re not mine, for even one second, you’re fucking delusional.”
“I’ll be your everything again, I can promise you that.”
don’t want it any other way. I want to be all about you, I want to be obsessed with you.”
“I think you miss having me inside you as much as I miss being in you.”
“This girl right here is everything to me. Literally the fucking reason I’m still breathing,”
“Is that official enough for you? Everyone knows now. You’re mine, and I’ll wait however long it takes for you to figure it out too.”
As much as she settles me down, I bring her strength to the surface.
Despite the rough times, I wouldn’t trade what we have now for anything. We’re saving each other a little every day.
