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Kindle Notes & Highlights
by
Elena Armas
Read between
November 18 - November 24, 2021
was a two-way road. Not only that, but it had actually been him, the one causing our fallout. I hadn’t started this feud between us.
They probably thought they were not taking any side, but they were. Their silence was doing exactly that.
“That’s why you didn’t speak up during the meeting where all this was dumped on me and then some? Because I didn’t ask for help? Because I am too stubborn to ever accept it?”
when it came to these situations, there were two groups of people. Those who believed that not saying anything made them stand in neutral ground and those who picked a side. And more often than not, it was the wrong one.
him to say whatever was brewing in his mind. “You’ve never needed anyone to fight your battles, Catalina. That’s one of the things I respect the most about you.”
We are talking about institutional sexism Aaron. What the fuck.
“On the other hand, I never pegged you for someone who would cower and not give their best when faced with a challenge. Whether it’s unfairly imposed or not,” he said, turning away and facing his laptop. “So, what’s it going to be?”
Omg Aaron - it’s a bigger issue we’re talking about here. Low key sexist babe.
“Whining or working?”
Fuck off Aaron omg
It was stupid, but it reminded me of how small he had made me feel all those months ago when I overheard him talking to Jeff. Or how he had almost thrown that mug I had gotten him as a welcome gift at my face. Or how all the remarks and jabs that came after that had never stopped bothering me.
What was the point when it was clear there was something wrong with me? I might have left Spain, but somehow, I had managed to leave my trust—my willingness to fall in love ever again—somewhere across the ocean.
Aaron’s throat worked. “It’ll do.” It’ll do?
Men need to unlearn the immediate reaction of anger because they don’t know how to actually open their mouth and properly communicate in an emotionally intelligent way. Fuck the patriarchy.
not getting why he was being so … privy.
Is that the right way to use ‘privy’?
Something passed between the two men, and for a heartbeat, I felt like I should intervene.
Just no
He hid it with a blink. “Okay.” That was the only answer he gave me.
He is obsessed with you, Lina
The biggest, widest, and handsomest smile was splitting his expression.
And then Aaron started laughing. His head tilted back, and his shoulders shook with laughter. And he was doing it on a stage, in front of all these people and in front of me, as if he didn’t have a care in the world. Neither did I, apparently. Because
“There are a few things you don’t know about me, Catalina.”
“You are right.” His voice was unspeakably flat. “Being your friend has always been the last thing on my mind.”
There was no way I’d put myself in a situation I had already been in, which had ended up so badly. For me. Only for me. So, even if all of it would be fake—had been fake last Saturday—I simply would not risk it.
“I always have time for you.”
Not wanting him to know I cared as much as I did. Simply because I shouldn’t.
The things people would say if they found out. I won’t allow myself to be questioned—”
“No. That kind of treatment is one I reserve for friends.”
Was that necessary?
Did she ever get over him? Did she ever get over everything that had happened? Of course not. Poor thing. What happened must have really messed her up.
To everyone watching, I wanted to look complete. Beautiful, flawless, unaffected. I needed to give the impression that I had my life back on track. All figured out. Happy. With a man on my arm.
shouldn’t be measuring myself in terms of having a man, looking thinner, or having clear skin. But, God, I knew that was what everybody else would be doing.
There is an explanation, but it doesn’t matter right now.”
Hyperaware of how close he had come, I stuttered. Suddenly not knowing what to say or if I was expected to say anything at all. Aaron’s arm reached out, the backs of his fingers gracing my temple. My lips parted, tingles spreading down my skin. It was him who lowered his voice then. “Always fighting me.” I looked up at his handsome and stern face, his assessing blue eyes surveying my reaction. “Resisting me.” My heart tripped, making my chest feel like I had just sprinted a mile or two. Aaron’s head dipped, his mouth coming close to where his fingers had been a few seconds ago. Almost as close
...more
was Aaron leading his finger to his mouth, parting those lips that were so often pressed in an unamused line, and wiping the chocolate clean off his thumb.
If I were smarter, I’d tell Aaron the whole story. But as of lately, I’d seemed to excel at making only stupid decisions. So, that was all I gave him.
Idiot
Spanish love deception. My made-up boyfriend.
“You are not on your own anymore. It’s you and me now. We are in this together, and we’ve got this.”
The north of Spain was known for granting its inhabitants the chance to experience all four seasons in the span of a few hours, any day of the year.
Melbourne
“It’s sexy, but don’t ever feel like you need to impress me. I already am.”
Wasn’t that exactly what had led me to crush on my professor in the first place?
He hadn’t needed to point that out. Not after downgrading our past to old friends.
touched me. And yet, he managed to keep me grounded, all at once. Every time my head had threatened to roam away, Aaron had pulled me right back before my feet could lift off the floor.
“Attending a wedding alone is not all that dramatic. Plus, I wouldn’t want to make it about me.”
Asshole
He leaned and brushed his lips over my shoulder.
Something flashed across his face, too quickly for me to grasp its meaning. Then, he nodded and directed a small smile at me.
with was not only my ex, but also the man who had been the other half of the relationship that was the catalyst for me leaving everything I had once called home. But I had made the choice to date him. My university professor. The man who would introduce my sister to the love of her life.
heartbroken runaway. But the damage went beyond a simple breakup. After that, I went through the worst year of my life. I almost quit uni and threw away my education. My future. All because people, those I had considered friends at some point, spun disgusting lies about me. And it hadn’t only scarred me; it had also impacted my family.
And with no repercussions to the man
“Just like the big jerk I had advertised myself to be, I ran her out. And to this day, I regret it every time it crosses my mind. Every time I look at her.” He didn’t even blink as he talked, looking straight into my eyes. And I didn’t think I did either. I didn’t think I was even breathing. “All the time I wasted so foolishly. All the time I could have had with her.”
“Because when I finally take those lips in mine, it will be the furthest thing from pretending. I will not be showing you what it would be like if you were mine. I’ll show you what it is. And I sure as hell won’t be showing how good I could make you feel if you called me yours. You’ll already know that I am.” He paused, and I swore I could see the restraint in his posture. As if he was stopping himself from pouncing and returning us to our former position, right against the hard surface of the wardrobe door. “When I finally kiss you, there won’t be any doubt in your mind that it is real.”
“You feel complete in my arms. You feel like my home.”
