Any Way the Wind Blows (Simon Snow, #3)

by Rainbow Rowell

“No—because you don’t have anything to be sorry for. Come on, Snow, look at me.” I try. He looks tired. And sad. And embarrassed. “I don’t mind this,” he says. “Any of it.” “Oh my God, Baz—don’t lie to me! This isn’t what anyone wants to happen in bed.” I try to cover my face again, but his hand is on my cheek. He’s too close. “I’m not lying! I don’t mind comforting you, Simon. Or holding you. I don’t mind giving you what you need, whatever it is you need. I prefer it to you pushing me away. Or ignoring me.” I look up at him. “But you could date anyone you want. You could date everyone you want. And none of them would start bloody crying during foreplay.” Baz shrugs. “You don’t always cry . . . Sometimes you go glassy-eyed and nonresponsive.” My hands are twisted in my hair. “Fuck-ing a, I can’t believe you’re joking about this.” I try to roll away from him, but he’s all steel bands when he wants to be. He pins me down by the shoulders. “Wait,” he says. “Listen to me. Are you listening?” I close my eyes but stop trying to push him off. “I want to be with you,” he says. “And this is where we are right now. And I truly don’t mind, Simon.” I open my eyes. Baz is looking right down at me. “You don’t want more?” I ask. He shoves at my shoulders. “Of course I do. But not with just anyone. I want more with you, you twit.” I try to sit up, away from him, and this time he lets me. “What if I can’t give you more?” I say. “What if this is my best-case scenario?” Baz is dismissive. “I...