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April 10 - April 10, 2024
Because you are here, I must stay, Amma whispers to me.
To the Lord of Death, she says Wait a while longer.
I’m caught between the life I want to lead and the one she thinks I should.
When You Are Different you constantly compare. You hide and wonder
Our parents are God, their words are law.
It feels like we’ve already entered the future, while they only live in the past.
It’s about what happens when the bad guys fight back, and fight back hard. It’s about learning how to be a hero in spite of the fact that your dad is the most evil guy in the universe.
But I am always halfway, caught between the life my parents want and the one I have to live.
But so much of what I want to tell her stays unsaid.
“You don’t have to worry about living in two worlds. You live in only one world, and that is the world in which we love you. No matter what your choices are. We raised you, we trust you, and we love you.”
Together, we decide that a hero: Is brave, but not without fear. Because if you fear nothing, how can you be brave? Says what they believe is right. Because if you cannot say what you believe in, how much do you believe in it? Works to make the world better. Because doing something is even more important than talking about it. Acts out of love for others. Because caring for other people is the biggest difference between a hero and a villain.
A mother gives you life, nourishes you, protects you, helps you when you’re hurt. But sometimes it feels like too much.
And it turns out I have yet another family, one I never thought to call my own.
Guilt is a sluggish stream that fills my veins, weighs me down. My thoughts are full of should haves.
And I realize we are friends, both living two lives, both rushing over rapids in separate boats.
A hero is brave, but not without fear. Says what they believe is right. Works to make the world better. Acts out of love for others.
At least you’re trying. That’s the first step to being a hero.
A mother is like life’s blood Nourishing you Protecting you Helping you stop hurting Until she is gone. I am still here, but she cannot stay.
It hasn’t always been easy living so far from those I love. It hasn’t always been easy being different.
I’m sorry I can’t help you with the difficult times. I’m sorry I won’t be there to celebrate all your successes. But know that I love you, my star, my dear one, my darling. Know that you are already everything I hoped you would be, and more.
