The Intentional Father: A Practical Guide to Raise Sons of Courage and Character (Includes Activities, Rites of Passage, and Steps for Parenting Boys. ... for Dads, Grandpas, and Expectant Fathers)

by Jon Tyson

THE PRINCIPLE We need to have a vision of the day our sons will leave our homes and work backward from that day with a plan to help them gain the knowledge, skills, character, and experiences they need. This will enable them to move into the world as confident and healthy men.

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In The Funeral Exercise, you are encouraged to ask specific questions: If this is your funeral, what do you want your spouse to say about you? What would you like to hear your kids say? What would you hope your coworkers would say? And, ultimately, what witness would God give on your one and only life?

But reality bumps up against this desire because we don’t have a plan. The painful truth is that we really have no strategic way of seeing those wonderful dreams come to pass.

For fathers, this holds true: if we don’t transform the pain we experienced as sons, we will pass that pain on to our own sons.

Determine that you will have a clean heart when you finish, that instead of bringing pain into the life of your son, you’re going to transform it into something new, something beneficial.