Inseparable

by Simone de Beauvoir

Beauvoir never stopped weeping for the lost Zaza. Perhaps she herself worked so hard to become who she was as a sort of memorial: Beauvoir must express herself to the utmost, because Zaza could not.

War and religion had defeated me.

You don’t believe what you believe on purpose: could you be punished because certain ideas come into your mind?

I felt that from one end of the earth to the other, the trees spoke to each other and spoke to God; it sounded like both music and a prayer were piercing my heart before rising to the heavens.

Living without her was no longer living.

In books, I thought with sadness, people declare their love or hatred for each other, they dare admit to everything they feel in their hearts; why is that impossible in life?

And how pleasant it all was, being in awe of so much magnificence, feeling within oneself a soul as pure and radiant as the Host at the heart of the monstrance! And then, one day, the soul and the heavens become enveloped in darkness, and you find, lodged deep within yourself, remorse, sin, fear.