Designing the Mind: The Principles of Psychitecture

by Ryan A. Bush

Remorse--Never give way to remorse but immediately say to yourself: that would merely mean adding a second stupidity to the first--If you have done harm, see how you can do good.

If you love a flower, don’t pick it up. Because if you pick it up it dies and it ceases to be what you love. So if you love a flower, let it be. Love is not about possession. Love is about appreciation.

Our best hope for the future is not to get people to think of all humanity as family—that’s impossible. It lies, instead, in an appreciation of the fact that, even if we don’t empathize with distant strangers, their lives have the same value as the lives of those we love.

There is no more reliable proof of greatness than to be in a state where nothing can happen to make you disturbed.

It is evenness of mind, unshakeable freedom of mind, a state of inner equipoise that cannot be upset by gain and loss, honor and dishonor, praise and blame, pleasure and pain.

Equanimity is about feeling the way you feel about your five-years-ago-problems right now, about your current problems. Meaning they either aren't problems, are problems that will sort themselves out, or are problems that are good to have.

A person who wants to be happy must evidently pursue and practice self-control.

When we allow ourselves to be compelled to act against our own wishes, goals, and ideals, we place our well-being in the hands of others who have far less vested interest in it. When we let the fear of standing out prevent us from defending our values, we step away from our ideals. When we let our jealous friends talk us out of our ambitions, we step away from our ideals. And when we let the desire to be liked by others cause us to be less liked by ourselves, we step away from our ideals.

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.

Do not act as if you were going to live ten thousand years. Death hangs over you. While you live, while it is in your power, be good.

Nothing discloses real character like the use of power. It is easy for the weak to be gentle. Most people can bear adversity. But if you wish to know what a man really is, give him power. This is the supreme test.

“every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.” Becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously edit your beliefs, and to upgrade and expand your identity.

The reason to act in accordance with your values, even when no one is watching, is that you are always being watched by the most important person: yourself.

Whenever you do a thing, though it can be known but to yourself, ask yourself how you would act were all the world looking at you, and act accordingly. Encourage all your virtuous dispositions, and exercise them whenever an opportunity arises; being assured that they will gain strength by exercise, as a limb of the body does, and that exercise will make them habitual.

The state of being a person you yourself don’t approve of is the worst form of prison in this life. Being a person you truly love and respect, not merely someone with an inflated self-esteem, is the highest hallmark of the good life. If you value your own values - which by definition, you do - you have the most powerful reason to live according to them that could possibly be given. You are both the protagonist and the audience of your own life, and how greatly you appeal to this audience of one is the measure of well-being you will realize.

We design our world, while our world acts back on us and designs us.

You shape the garden of your mind by planting specific things from your environment, such as the books you read, experiences you have, and people you surround yourself with.

Satisfaction is not found in the achievement of goals, but in their pursuit, so many of the steps along the way to your goals should be enjoyable.47 The most proficient and prolific artists, authors, and architects all achieved what they did because they found a way to capitalize on what they already loved. Set goals that fit who you are, what you enjoy, and what you value.

Though one may conquer a thousand times a thousand men in battle, yet he indeed is the noblest victor who conquers himself. - Siddhārtha Gautama

You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. - Marcus Aurelius

What the superior man seeks, is in himself; what the ordinary man seeks, is in others. - Confucius

Conquering others takes force. Conquering yourself is true strength. - Lao Tzu

There are too many people with great lives on paper who are still miserable at the end of the day. Many who face immense adversity who are genuinely fulfilled. You can only be as happy as your mind is programmed to be. This means that although you may feel content at any given time, that satisfaction is illusory insofar as it can be taken away. If losing all of your possessions, circumstances, social standing, and relationships would deprive you of all your happiness, what you have cannot be called happiness in the first place.

When your external world is in chaos, you can place your focus on your internal world. Let your mind become your sanctuary. Build a palace of clarity and peace within you that you can visit any time.

Only those who have achieved greatness of the mind are worthy of our deep admiration.

“the meaning of earthly existence lies not, as we have grown used to thinking, in prospering, but… in the development of the soul."7

If we want to truly improve the world, we need to train people to build systematically better minds - our emphasis on “making people happy” needs to shift to “making happy people.”