The Bennet Women

by Eden Appiah-Kubi

THOU ART A BENNET WOMAN, FULLY GROWN AND RESPONSIBLE: ACT THINE AGE, NOT THINE SHOE SIZE THOU SHALT KNOW THINE WORTH AND ACT ACCORDINGLY THOU SHALT LOVE THINE BENNET SISTER AND SUPPORT HER IN HER ENDEAVORS THOU SHALT TAKE NO MESS The last three commandments had survived from its very first iteration. Across the decades they were deemed the most important: THOU SHALT TRY, EVEN WHEN AFRAID OF FAILURE THOU SHALT ASK FOR HELP; THERE IS NO SHAME IN THIS THOU SHALT PARTICIPATE IN AND EMBRACE THE ADVENTURE THAT IS LONGBOURN COLLEGE

Your mother still has a distinct sense of propriety—and a tinge of puritanism that runs through a lot of second-wave feminism. She doesn’t like the idea of women dressing sexily because she thinks it’s for the male gaze.

Another thing to figure out, Jamie thought, stifling a sigh. It was hard enough just getting people to accept her as a woman. “This is . . . exhausting.” She groaned, rubbing her eyes. “What?” EJ asked. “Misogyny!” Jamie said, waving her arms. “There’s just . . . so many flavors.” “Internal, external, cool ranch,” EJ offered sardonically. “Some days being a woman is choosing the cherry for your shit sundae.”

It was a truth not universally acknowledged that a black girl at a mostly white college, in an even whiter college town, must befriend someone who can do her hair.

Doing elite ballet had shown her how wide the gap between the middle class and the upper-middle class could be, but Longbourn revealed the yawning chasm between someone like her and the very rich. Her deficiency in the language of luxury goods was a particularly sore spot.

she was thrilled by her daughter’s career pragmatism. She’d often told her children, “I don’t care what you do—actress, lion tamer, sea captain—as long as you have a salary and retirement plan by thirty. Broke in your twenties is an adventure. Broke in your thirties is a crisis.”

‘I’m not going to pressure you into accepting any of my many invitations, but here’s the thing about Longbourn: for the magic to happen for you, you have to show up. It’s not going to come to your dorm room.’

“I don’t think you should go after EJ. You’re not ready.” “Why?” he asked softly. “There’s too much Carrie in your letter and your approach. It’s selfish. It’s about your image. It’s not about her.” Will looked crushed. “But I like EJ, a lot. I said a bunch of good things,” he insisted. “But the nice things you said made the awful things sound even worse.” Lily tugged on the ends of his scarf. “You wouldn’t be good to her, not now. Until you can say how you feel in a way that’s all about her, you need to say nothing at all.”

“The difference between finishing a postgraduate program and dropping out is often knowing what you want to do afterward,”

A smart woman can stand on her own two feet. Conversely, there is nothing people respect less than a woman defined by men.”

You only get this lesson if you have black parents: Talent can get you into the room, but it won’t help you stay; hard work can keep you in the room, but it won’t win you any prizes. To soar high, to get noticed, you must be consistently excellent.

“Bro, the people who can do open relationships honestly are the people that don’t want monogamy. If you do want monogamy but can’t have it, an open relationship isn’t for you. You’ll end up punishing her for taking you at your word,”