If you do use words, it’s best to restate what they’re saying; this is called reflective listening. You can’t talk someone out of feeling angry, sad, or frustrated, but you can be a sponge and absorb their emotional intensity. If you stay regulated, ultimately they will “catch” your calm. It also helps to use some form of rhythmic regulating activity to keep yourself regulated while you’re doing this—like taking a walk, kicking a ball back and forth, shooting some baskets, coloring side-by-side; there are dozens of rhythmic ways to help us regulate.

