The Fourth Time Charm (Fulton U, #4)

by Maya Hughes

Fear for Marisa clogged my throat and made it hard to focus. I needed to get to her. I needed to see her. I needed her to be okay.

She was wild haired and sooty faced, and she’d never been more beautiful. My heart triple jumped and I had to lock my knees so I didn’t collapse.

Sliding into the bed, I curled my body around hers, wrapping my arm around her. Just for tonight. Just because of how close I’d come to losing her. Just because I couldn’t help myself.

Tonight, I’d hold her in my arms. Tomorrow, I’d figure out how to deal with being in love with the coach’s daughter.

He felt like he didn’t belong in the limelight, but he did. He was the best person I knew. Too bad he didn’t feel even half of what I felt for him.

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Not after I recreated the senior trip for her after she’d saved my dad’s life and she had made it categorically known that she wasn’t into me that way.

“I love her.” He squeezed the back of his neck, shaking his head. “Will you still love her in a year? In two years?” “I’ve loved her since we were fifteen. It’s never going away.”

Sometimes it felt like I could disappear and no one would really care. It felt like I was a temporary fixture in someone’s life until they moved on. But with LJ I felt like I mattered—always.

“I can’t believe you did this for me.” He peered over at me and my stomach flipped like there was a wacky-waving-inflatable-arm-flailing tube man going bonkers inside. “When are you going to get it? I’d do anything for you.”

“I love you, Marisa.” This wasn’t the first time he’d said it, but this time it felt different. It felt heart-stoppingly, soul-scorchingly different.

“I love you, Marisa.” She kissed my chest and her smile widened. “I love you too.” She said it like any other time the words had passed her lips. I could let it pass. I could let it pass by like saying hi or bye to a friend, but I needed her to know. Tucking the hair behind her ear, I rubbed my thumb along the underside of her chin and held her gaze. “Love you, love you. I love you, Marisa.” She stiffened, staring back at me like this wasn’t inevitable. Like it wasn’t impossible not to. “And I have all kinds of plans for us once I get back from Chicago and once I’m drafted. Plans that include you.”

“I was an idiot. An asshole and an idiot. Everything you said in the museum was true. I was scared and ready to run at the slightest hint that you might leave me first.” A deep, shuddering breath. “It’s one thing that’s been inevitable in my life. But that wasn’t fair, because you’ve never been that person.” Her voice cracked. “You’ve been the one person who I’ve always been able to be myself with, who’s always been there for me, and that made it the hardest to think of you leaving me. “I don’t want to lie to you anymore. And no matter what, whether you can forgive me or not, I need you to know the truth about how I feel. The only thing that comes from people not saying their true feelings is hurt and pain, and I don’t want that for you. I’d never want that for you. I don’t want to hide any part of myself from you anymore. You leaving…it would’ve broken me, but—shocker of the century—that happened anyway. Only I did it to myself because I was terrified of what would happen when you moved on.”

“I’m scared shitless. I’m worried about what will happen when you get drafted. What will happen if I go to Italy. What happens when you find out I know nothing about healthy, caring relationships like your parents, and I make mistakes. I worry you’ll finally realize that I’m not good enough for you. And that you’ll get tired of trying to choke down my food. “But most of all, I worry I’ve destroyed the one relationship that means the most to me in the world. More than anything, I want to be with you in whatever form that takes. “I love you, LJ. With everything I have, I love you, and even though I’m scared out of my mind, I want to be with you.”