Carl's Doomsday Scenario (Dungeon Crawler Carl, #2)

by Matt Dinniman

Enchanted BigBoi Boxers. This item has been Upgraded once. All right, you already know the description of this item. Something something Incredible Hulk, blah, blah, blah. Now you want to know how this item has been upgraded. Right? So here are the original benefits of these naughty little undies: + 2 to Constitution Wearer may cast a level 15 Protective Shell once every 30 hours. That’s some good shit right there. But we can do better than that. Here’s a few additional benefits. + 5 to Dexterity + 5 to Intelligence + 3 more (for a total of + 5) to Constitution + The Freeballing Benefit The benefit’s description was: Freeballing And I’m freeeeee! Freeee Ballling! Usually reserved for monk classes and those too soused to reliably dress themselves, recipients of this benefit receive an additional 100% damage bonus to all attacks that originate below the waist. In addition, all skills that originate from below the waist train 20% faster. But as the name implies, this benefit allows only a single layer of armor or clothing to cover your crotch area. And since you’re already wearing these, it looks like you won’t be getting trousers anytime soon. Mordecai was still laughing. “You shouldn’t have said you really wanted those pants.”