By the Numbers (Love Logic, #3)

by K.M. Neuhold

Even with the pen in the way, he silently mouths each word as he reads them. Fuck, that’s cute. His phone buzzes on the couch next to him, and I quickly drop my eyes back down, so he doesn’t catch me staring at him like a weirdo. When I look up again, he’s wearing a huge grin, his entire face lit up as he looks at his phone.

I take the time to style my hair, going for an artfully messy look as if someone’s been running their fingers through it. In my bedroom, I pick up the pair of thick-rimmed

glasses with useless, plastic lenses and slide them onto my face. They always feel a bit like a disguise; the whole uber-nerd get-up does. It’s funny if I let myself think about it, that in order to get laid I put away all the truly nerdy things about myself and instead don this phony hipster nerd persona. I tug my shirt over my head, careful not to ruin my hair, and then grab a pair of tight, dark wash jeans that hug my ass just right. Once I’m dressed, I stuff a condom and a packet of lube into my pocket just in case.

By the time we reach Twisted Cherry, the rest of our friends are already there. It looks like Riot has the night off, standing around the high-top table with everyone else while a woman with a nose ring hustles behind the bar. Seph has the same date with her again, the two of them looking awfully cozy, whispering in each other’s ears and grinning like idiots. Sigh. The rest of the group is doing much of the same—Elijah and Pax flirting and kissing, Hudson playfully pinching Leo’s

ass while Leo and Riot kiss, Riot’s free arm wrapped around Bishop. It looks complicated but certainly nice between the four of them. And, of course, Theo and I are the only single ones in the group again tonight. Bigger internal sigh.

Maybe Pax is right. Life is messy anyway, so what could it hurt for Alex and me to have a little fun fooling around and letting off steam? God knows we could both use it. And like Alex said: we’re both adults; it’s no big deal.

The door swings open, my brother standing on the other side, blessedly fully dressed. “You look like shit,” he says, looking me up and down.

“Thanks, I love you too, dude.”

I kick my shoes off and follow Elijah into the living room where the TV is paused, Elijah’s homework scattered over the coffee table, the couch cushions all rucked up. If I had to guess, E was trying to do

some work when my brother distracted him by fooling around after breakfast, and then I came by to cockblock them. Strangely, this thought bothers me less than it usually does, and I’m not sure why.

It was just an excuse to walk away from my brother for a minute, but once I’m in the kitchen, scrambled eggs sound like a great idea, so I pull what I need out of the refrigerator and the cupboards and get to work. I sigh loudly when my brother clomps into the kitchen. Who walks that heavily without shoes on? Elijah is a saint to live with the man.

I glance over at Theo who

seems to have been found by Bella, an eight-year-old spitfire who told me a few weeks ago that they should fire her math teacher and hire me instead.

Elijah is cuddled up with my brother, Pax’s arm around

him, holding him close enough that he might as well have his boyfriend in his lap. I wait for the jealous pang to resonate through me, but it takes a minute, and when it finally comes, it’s a dull echo of what I’ve gotten used to since the two of them got together. Am I finally getting over him? After all these years of imagining that Elijah and I were meant to be together, has my heart finally gotten the message?

But before I can open my mouth, Pax steals my lines. “Oh, hell no. As soon as we get home, I’m going to email this asshole.”

“You don’t have to,” Elijah rushes to assure him. “Nerdlet,” he says, taking Elijah’s face between his hands and looking at him with so much love it…actually, it makes my heart really happy for my best friend. Everyone deserves someone who looks at them exactly like that. “I love you. Let me help you with this.” He nods and kisses my brother.

I snort a laugh, imagining how pissed and terrified the guy must have been with this vicious chihuahua of a man threatening him like that. I’m

picturing him being all kinds of aggressive and bad ass, but in reality, I’m sure he smiled sweetly while he threatened the guy’s job.

“I don’t know,” I hedge, twirling my pencil between my fingers and then tapping the eraser against my bottom lip. “I also could just stop now and go jerk off by myself. I do have a lot of fun toys, so it’s not exactly a hardship.” If his eyes were smoldering before, it’s nothing compared to the look he gives me at the mention of my super fun drawer of debauchery. He drags his thumb over the page of his textbook, and I’ve never wished I were a piece of paper more in my life. I want his hands on me

again. Three days was way too long ago. “If you finish your homework, I’ll go with you to your bedroom and let you use any toy you want on me.” Damn, he’s a good negotiator. He should look into a career in hostage negotiations or high powered business deals or… “Deal,” I agree eagerly. “But we’d better not make this a habit, or I’ll start getting horny any time I have to solve an equation,” I tease, echoing my words from a few weeks ago.

My heart jumps as Theo slips into the room and looks around nervously. He has my bag slung over his shoulder, and he grins when he spots me. He hustles over to me, shooting apologetic looks at everyone staring at him. “You forgot all your stuff this morning,” he explains in a whisper as I stare at him dumbfounded.

“Yeah,” I agree, cringing at my response. “Um, thank you.” Theo gives me a lopsided smile as he slides the bag off his shoulder and hands it to me, and then reaches into his pocket to pull out my phone and my set of apartment keys. He gives me a pointed look as he presses the key into my hands, one arch of his eyebrows clearly communicating “Don’t lose these.” “Thank you,” I say again. “No problem. I’ll see you later.” He lingers for a second, and I start to wonder if he’s

thinking about kissing me right here in front of people, in front of Elijah. But of course, he’s not. That’s what boyfriends do if they’re comfortable with PDAs that is. It’s not what roommates who happen to be having sex with each other do. He nods at Elijah and gives me one last look before leaving the room as quickly as he came. I glance over at Elijah, who’s watching Theo go with a curious, calculating loo...

Luckily, the TA starts talking just in time to distract him from whatever calculations he’s doing about my hic...

I nod and slide my foot farther up his leg. He elbows me and acts like it was an arm spasm, earning us weird looks from everyone around the table.

I plop down on the couch and get comfortable, pulling my own favorite candy, M&Ms, out of the bag.

As amazing as the sex has been, our friendship has become even more important to me.

“You forgot to carry the one,” A deep voice whispers from over my shoulder. I startle and whip my head around to find the very incarnation of my musings standing over me with a grin on his tempting

lips. Also, there should be a law against men smelling so damn good when you need to dump them; I might have to write my congressman about that. “I don’t need to carry the one, smart ass.” He pulls out the chair next to me and sits down, le...

I shuffle my papers and shift in my seat, my body and my brain locked in a battle about whether to move c...

He kisses me back, untucking his legs from their position and putting them on either side of me as he buries his fingers in my hair and parts his lips. I slip my hands under his shirt and slide them up his back, loving the soft, warm feeling of his skin under my fingers.

“I want to take you on a date,” I murmur against his mouth, feeling bolder now that his mouth is on mine, and he’s breathing faster just because of me. “I want to tell people that I like you,” I continue, and his breath hitches. “I want to call you my boyfriend and glare at anyone else who tries to pick you up at the bar.” He laughs against my mouth, resting his forehead against mine. “You really mean that?” I nod, bumping our noses together. “I really do.”

Alex rolls off of me, flopping down on the bed while I remove the condom and toss it onto the floor. “Come here, Lex.” I drag him closer without waiting for him to respond, wrapping my arms around him and tucking his head under my chin. “I like that,” he says, sounding drunk and sleepy from an overload of pleasure. “What’s that?” I run my fingers along his back, one of his legs slung over mine, his wet, spent cock pressed against my thigh.

“Lex. I like it,” Alex explains. “I’ve never had a nickname. Other than Alex I mean. It feels, I don’t know, special I guess.” I smile and kiss the top of his head. “Sexy Lexy,” I tease, and he giggles again, the sound hitting a place deep inside me that I didn’t even know existed. I am so fucking gone over this man.

We head down the street to

the same cafe we always go to, both place an order, then grab a table. “So, you and Theo,” he says with a knowing smirk as soon as we sit down. My heart skips a beat. Theo did tell him. Fuck, that makes me feel irrationally happy. I dip my head, grinning hard and no doubt blushing like crazy. Ugh, I am not a blusher. Love does crazy things to people. Or like. No one said anything about love. I am getting so far ahead of myself it’s not even funny.

It doesn’t matter now, and Elijah finding out about Theo’s feelings would only make things weird. There’s nothing for any of us to gain if the truth comes out. “Do you have anything planned for Pax’s birthday? That’s coming up, right?” I ask in a desperate attempt to change the subject.

Elijah’s smile turns all mushy, and his cheeks pink. Fucking score. He launches into telling me all about a surprise party he’s thinking of throwing together. I offer to help and that’s what we spend the rest of lunch discussing. It’s sweet how easy it is to distract him with his boyfriend. That’s what love looks like.

I slide onto the barstool, propping my elbows up on the rough wood of the bar top, and sigh. Riot arches an eyebrow when he notices me. “I’m not going to serve you,” he says flatly. “Unless you want a soda.” “Soda’s fine. Sprite,” I agree. The last thing I need with the mood I’m in is alcohol. He moves confidently behind the bar, grabbing a glass and filling it for me. His black t-shirt

shirt fits snuggly around his heavily tattooed biceps, his jeans clinging to his ass like they’re hanging on for dear life. I can see why Bishop, Hudson, and Leo all fell for the man. He’s absolutely gorgeous. He turns back to me and places the glass down, then runs his hands through his teal hair and leans against the bar.

“But what if he never loves me the same way he loved El—the other guy?” I nearly whisper this question, embarrassed by my own insecurity. “He won’t,” Riot answers simply, sending a flare of panic through me. “You could love a hundred people, but it will be in a hundred different ways. I love Bishop, Hudson, and Leo. I’m committed to all three of them. I want to spend the rest

of my life with each of them. But I don’t love them in the same way, and they don’t love each other the same way they love me. Jealousy is a bitch of a thing to tackle, but if you could see yourself loving this person, if maybe you already do love him,” he says knowingly, causing heat to rise in my cheeks. “Then it’s worth seeing if you can get past the hang ups. Talk to him about it, tell him how you’re feeling, see if it’s worth making it work.”

I’m feeling much better about things as I finally head home. When I buzz to be let in, I don’t get the usual playful lecture about forgetting my key, just the sound of the door being unlocked. I frown and head inside, taking the stairs two at a time. I open the door to the apartment, and the reason for the silence becomes clear as I’m met with an ambush.

I hit Alex with a series of three nerf darts right in the center of his forehead before he even knows what’s happening. Surprising your enemy is key to winning in nerf wars or whatever Sun Tzu said. “Hey,” he complains while I cackle evilly. “What the hell?” “Another important childhood experience,” I explain seriously, holding my fire for the moment. “I’ll tell you where you can find a Nerf gun of your own, but it’ll cost you a kiss.”

He smirks, grabbing the front of my shirt and planting a hard kiss against my lips. “Tell me and it’s on. But no more cheap shots.” “No promises.” I reach down and pinch his ass. “Yours is on the kitchen counter.” He narrows his eyes at me. “No fair, you’re going to trap me in there.” “Guess you’ll have to fight...

Of course, I’m not that nice because I didn’t load his gun for him when I left it on the counter. I step into the kitchen doorway and find him swearing under his breath, fumbling to get each of the Nerf darts into its chamber. “Any last words?” I ask dramatically. “Yeah.” He gets the last one in place and smirks. “Lick my balls.” Alex aims and hits me right between the eyes and

then tries to get around me while I’m rubbing the spot. But he doesn’t account for my cat-like reflexes. I grab him around the waist, and he squeals. “Gladly, Lexy,” I murmur near his ear, kissing his cheek before letting him go. He doesn’t waste any time, darting out of the kitchen, his footsteps thundering down the hallway to the living room, and I’m hot on his trail.

Theo makes a show of grabbing my keys off the little hook he put up near the door and shoving them into my pocket.

“See, this is the problem, my keys create an unsexy bulge in these tight jeans,” I complain, patting the lump. “Yes, but they prevent you from being locked outside and dying of exposure.” I roll my eyes. “So dramatic.”