Then, we get into relationships. We feel a sense of worth and importance. We feel desirable. And because we finally feel seen, we believe we have found ourselves. But what actually has happened is that we have begun losing ourselves in someone else. We discover codependency, unhealthy love, and heartbreak. Over and over. Eventually, we believe we are not only defective but unlovable. We develop poor coping strategies that create a pattern of self-destruction. This creates more disconnection as we lose trust in others, but more importantly in ourselves. We become putty, moldable by others. We
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