Some reassurance that you’re not using Plan A might be helpful, as in “I’m not telling you what to do” (you’re not), “You’re not in trouble” (they’re not), “I’m not mad at you” (you’re not), and “I’m just trying to understand” (you are). Notice I’m excluding statements like “I just want what’s best for you” and “I’m doing this (Plan A) because I love you.”
