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The first troll to round the corner is female, but I can only tell because of her immense, saggy tits which drag along the floor as she lopes closer. Trolls are hairy, wrinkly, smelly things with no more intelligence than any other wild animals, dangerous mostly because they heal faster than most immortals.
Cyclopes are only slightly less bestial than trolls: larger, smarter, able to make and use tools when the mood suits them, but still motivated by food, fear or fucking.
The stupid siren can’t just haunt my dreams for weeks and then tell me to come and save him from his own mother. I have more than a few choice words lined up for him.
I’m only third-born. Royalty barely matters when you’re not the heir or even the spare. Unless you happen to shame your family by getting cursed. Then it matters too much.
My instinct might have been ruling me at the time, but my heart has been sold on you since you first set foot on this ship.” “Love at first sight is a myth.” I snort. He tugs me closer and presses a kiss to the top of my hair. “Not for me.”
“Death with pride—”
“—is still fucking useless to everyone still living.”
I absorb everything she does and says like a sponge. I want to know all about her. Her magic. Her powers. Her likes and dislikes. I’m obsessed with my mate and I’m not even sorry.
“Oh, you’re going to regret this!”
“You tried to drown me! No amount of delicious fish will be enough to save you now. I will hack up hairballs on your pillow, I will knock every precious thing you own off tall places. You may laugh now, fish-man, but wait until you have moulted fur in your hideous man-skirts!”
“You are everything.” It’s the truth. She’s the mate I’d given up waiting for. In my darkest moments, I believed Fate had taken her away to punish me.
anyone else, it just makes them better at deception by necessity. Cirio knows the bare basics of our bargain. Enough to take pity on
