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I lie to myself all the time. But I never believe me. The Outsiders, S. E. Hinton
They rush around me, but my eyes are on her.
“I’ll wait.” I grind my teeth and step back. Her lips part, a small puff of air coming out. She looks at my mouth. “For what?” The lethal side of me, the one itching to play this game no matter the consequences, tries to take over and speak the truth. I shove it down. You, I say in my head.
Anastasia is poetry on the paper.
‘You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want.’”
“Be a football star. Live your best life. Take chances and have no regrets. Those are my three things for you on this new day,” she says, her face tilting up to me. Her hand squeezes mine. My voice is husky. “You stay gold, Anastasia, breathe every breath, read all the books, get into law school, fuck the haters, and stay beautiful. Six things for you because you deserve them all.”
“She needs a man with a soul,” Carl says. “A man who cares for others. A man who walks in the room and other men look up to him. A man who looks at her and the whole world stops spinning. The more nuanced a man’s soul, the deeper he loves. It’s a forever kind of thing, the kind that’s written in the stars.”
Because you believe in me. Because you’re beautiful. She’s the center of a hurricane, a calm that lulls you, then makes your world fucking amazing.
He’s in front of me, our bodies almost touching. “I love the things you say. You’re a dreamer, Anastasia. Like me. I’m glad I met you a year ago.” “Even though you hated me?” “I never hated you. I can’t stay away from you.”
When she kisses me, the world disappears. Yeah? When I kiss her, the world explodes.
She’s sunshine and light. Angel. Mine, the dark side of me insists.
“Rainbow, I love you,” he says in a quiet voice. “Crazy. Insane. Like can’t get you out of my head since that night in the library. It all happened so fast, and I was looking out for Donovan…then you showed up in my bedroom, and I figured out your name, and I knew I’d fucked up. Watching you with him nearly killed me, it did, and I pushed through, but that’s done. You, you…slay me, baby girl.”
She isn’t temporary. She’s the ultimate goal.
Fate has a way of bringing people together, and, baby girl, we’re meant to be.
