The Layover

by Lacie Waldon

sometimes a conversation can make you feel lonelier than silence ever did.

I’ve experienced enough of Alexander’s maybes to know they’re nothing more than the metaphorical carrot on the stick, designed to keep me looking forward to the future.

he’s not looking for understanding. He’s looking for a crack to take advantage of. He’s looking for a way to win this conversation and get his way.

If Alexander can’t do this, he’s not the difference I’ve been searching for. He’s just another person in my life who gets to pick and choose when he wants to have me.

All my life, I’ve made myself smaller around the people I love. Somehow I even managed to stop growing at a mere five feet. Tiny enough to be portable. Quiet enough to blend into the furniture. Agreeable. Easy. Whatever it takes to keep them from leaving me behind. Anything to keep them from wondering why I’m still there.