The 3 Alarms: A Simple System to Transform Your Health, Wealth, and Relationships Forever

by Eric Partaker

“Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans.”

Build some buffer into your day for the unplanned so you don’t get derailed if things don’t go as you’d like.

change from the language of oppression, negative self-talk, to the language of choice, positive self-talk. Whenever I felt the urge to procrastinate I would swap the “I have to” voice in my head with “I choose to.” You may not want to do a particular task, but you can always still choose to do it. This choice creates agency, helping you feel in control. Since you’re not being “forced” to do something, you’re less likely to employ procrastination as a self-defense tactic.

The clock of life is wound but once, And no one has the power To tell just when the hands will stop At late or early hour.

What if I set three alarms on my phone to trigger me: one to remind me I want to be healthy, one to remind me I want to be wealthy, and one to remind me I want to be a great husband and dad? I gave it a shot, and this simple action transformed my life.

To this day I still have those three simple alarms going off every single day. They segment my day into the three domains of life, and each is powered by a best-self identity that means something to me.

Each identity gives me a goal to both shoot for and measu...

The more you repeat a behavior, the more you become the identity associated with it. Behaviors reinforce the identity we want, and our chosen identity guides our behaviors. It’s a virtuous cycle, although identity should come first—or at least it’s much easier when it does.

After I had defined what my best identity was in each of the three domains, I wanted to provide evidence that I was stepping into these identities on a daily basis. If these identities represented the champion version of me, I needed something to prove I was being who I said I wanted to be.

Each day, I ask myself what single thing I could do to prove I’m the champion version of myself in each area of life that matters most.

Most people aspire to become their best selves some time in the future, but peak performers define what “best” looks like right now and start behaving from that identity today.

I’d like you to think of three groups of people. The first group lives a relatively stress-free life. The second group experiences stress and views it positively. The final group experiences stress and views it negatively. Which group do you think lives the longest? It’s the second group. The problem isn’t stress. It’s you.

Here are some of my favorite mindset shifts: Acknowledge your personal strengths—perhaps you’re nervous about stepping out on to stage, despite having spoken to groups of people many times before. Imagine the support of your loved ones—as if you partner, spouse, or children were at your side, enthusiastically encouraging you to step ahead. Remember times in the past when you overcame similar challenges—you may not have experienced that exact same situation before, but you have most certainly thrived through a similar level of challenge. Summon the most courageous version of yourself, and then follow your own advice—we often find it’s easier to give advice to others than follow our own, so bring this outside wisdom into the picture.

Behavioral scientists from Yale University have discovered that if you create a monetary penalty for not hitting a goal with a friend or an accountability partner, you will be up to five times more likely to achieve it.

Darwin was right: “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.”

Pre-mortems are a fantastic way to build antifragility into all aspects of your business and life. I often visualize all the things that could potentially go wrong in my day, including the typical things that might distract me and things that may not go the way that I had hoped. In my mind’s eye, I see these events as they unfold, and then also visualize how I would respond, as my best antifragile self, in each and every situation.

Once a mission has been completed, the soldiers gather for a debriefing, also called an After-Action Report. Rank is set aside, and everyone is encouraged to speak their mind. The discussions can become heated as emotions fly, all in the spirit of helping one another learn from successes and failures so they can better navigate the future life-and-death decisions they will face.

Set clear goals. Identify the problems that stand in the way of achieving your goals. Diagnose the problems to understand their root causes. Design plans or solutions to overcome the problems. Do what’s necessary to push these designs through to results.

The three-alarm method is a way to segment your day across these three domains. Through the use of simple phone alarms, you can remind yourself of what your best looks like. When the alarm goes off, you can think of yourself as stepping into that new identity—transforming into you at your best within that area. If you’re not completely following what I mean, go ahead and grab your phone right now. Open up your clock app, and begin setting up a new alarm, just as you would do when setting an alarm for tomorrow morning. As you create a new alarm, you’ll notice a field that says Alarm Name or Label. Give the alarm a name. When the alarm sounds, the name you’ve given it will appear on your phone. I have the following best-self identities set up as alarms on my phone: 6:30 a.m. World Fitness Champion 9:00 a.m. World’s Best Coach 6:30 p.m. World’s Best Husband & Father

A good life is one where you never settle, in which you are always challenging yourself to greater heights, using simple but proven tools for changing the way you think about yourself and how you act, treating productivity as a planning and execution practice, and learning to turn your obstacles into advantages. We are never done, never finished. Even when we reach a summit, there are new peaks.