Eruption (The Hunted, #3)

by Ivy Smoak

"No, let's just do what's next. Oh, perfect. List everyone you had sex with in order from best to worst, Penny."

Just, James at the top obviously. And then Austin. That's it." "You've only slept with two guys? What is wrong with you?!" "I've only slept with two guys," Bee said. "Yeah, but I already knew you were lame," Kendra said. "Penny, you're getting married. And you're telling me you only slept with two guys?!" "Well, that's not true," Melissa said. "She's slept with three guys." Melissa was staring at me. She looked like she was about to cry. "Right?" Fuck. "Oh, I mean, yeah, I guess. It's three. I don't know what I was thinking." I was thinking I didn't want to talk about this. Shit.

"She slept with Tyler during one of the many times she broke it off with James," Melissa said. "Or he broke it off with her. I don't remember which. They were so toxic at first. All they did was fight. Isn't that right, Penny?" I fidgeted with the bachelorette sash. Bee's eyes had gotten a little bigger. Kendra and Marie were looking back and forth between Melissa and I. "So, you really thought Tyler was that bad in bed?" Melissa asked. "You didn't even remember you slept with him? I certainly remember." "No, it wasn't that. I just thought..." "That talking about it is awkward?" Melissa took another shot of vodka. "The fact that you slept with my boyfriend isn't awkward at all. The fact that the two of you hang out all the time is super normal. Right?" she said and looked at everyone else at the table.

"Where is Tyler on your scale, Penny? Now I'm just super curious." Melissa's face was bright red. I had been trying to avoid this. I didn't want to fight with her again. Tonight had been going so well. "I don't know. It was so long ago..." "God, just tell me." "Below James." What was she expecting me to say? "So, he's not as good as James? You're such a bitch." "No, Tyler's really good in bed. I just...I'm in love with James." "So, you think Tyler's great in bed? What, do you still fantasize about him or something? You're the worst friend ever."

"God I miss you," James said and then there was long sigh. "I'm calling you from the hotel lobby because Rob won't let me have my phone. We're staying at some place called the Blue Parrot Resort. You can call me back at this number, but I'll be back tonight. I can't wait to see you. Oh, and you'll need the pa...hey, Rob! No, I wasn't calling Penny. Fuck, get off of me!" The recording beeped, signaling the end of the message.

I played the message for the hundredth time. My intense hangover had made me sleep till well past two o'clock. And I had woken up to this message. James' voice was soothing even though his words weren't. He missed me? He didn't fucking miss me. It seemed like he was plenty entertained.

If I closed my eyes and pictured him smiling at me, I felt like I could forgive anything. But I couldn't live with him sneaking around. Maybe at first I could, but it would eat away at me. It would slowly kill me. If the man I loved didn't love me back, the best thing I could do was let him go. I wanted him to be happy. I cared about him so much. But it didn't matter how rational it was. I'd never be able to let him go. I needed him. Even if he cheated on me? Even if he'd do it again? God.

I put the rest of the pictures into the shoebox full of love notes to Isabella and slid it under the bed. James would be back soon. I didn't want to fight with him. And I certainly didn't want to confront him about cheating on me. I couldn't have that conversation. He had to bring it up. He had to confess what he had done to me. I didn't have the strength to do it. Maybe he was going to come home and break up with me immediately. If that's really what he wanted, would I be able to let him go? Would I even have a choice?

I wasn't sure what I had been thinking earlier. There was no way I could ever let him go. If he was cheating on me, we could work through it. We had to. I couldn't live without him. And I couldn't let him end it with me. We were getting married on Saturday.

"I cave," James whispered so quietly that if I had been sleeping, I definitely wouldn't have heard him. I pressed my lips together and tried to breathe slowly so that he couldn't hear me crying. "You win," he said and placed a soft kiss against the back of my neck. Now that he was back he suddenly wanted me again? I felt cheap. Maybe my mom was right. Even though she had said it over two years ago, maybe what we had wasn't love. Because a key part of love in my eyes was being enough for one another. It was about being faithful. I wasn't enough for James. I wasn't sure why I ever thought I could be.

We needed to talk, but I couldn't do it right now. I needed to calm down. Because right now, I hated him. I hated how content he looked sleeping. Was he thinking of that slut from this weekend? Or Rachel or Isabella?

Maybe it was better to get it out of the way sooner than later. I needed to just confront him. And then he'd apologize. Then we'd be good. Simple. I felt like I wanted to throw up. I tried to tell myself it was from eating a pint of ice cream instead of how worried I was about losing him. Before I could think anymore, I walked out of the break room and toward James' office.

"Penny, what's going on? Are you having second thoughts?" "I don't know." I immediately saw the flash of doubt on his face. It was the same way he had looked at me back when he was a professor. Like he didn't believe I could possibly love him. He wasn't supposed to be the one feeling hurt right now. He was the one that cheated on me. If he was scared of losing me, all he needed to do was apologize.

"Whatever doubts you're having, please just tell me. Whatever you're worried about, I know we can work it out. I love you with everything that I am." He still wanted to be with me? Maybe I was blowing everything out of proportion. Men did stupid stuff during their bachelor parties all the time.

"I was just calling to see if you had fun during James' bachelor party." Rob laughed. "That's a ridiculous question. It was fucking awesome." "So, what did you guys do?" "Well, I won over the hottest girl there and Matt acted like a little bitch about it."

"Are you trying to find out if we hired strippers, got him wasted, and then he engaged in tons of unprotected sex with strangers and now has a baby momma?" Jesus. "Did you? Did he?" Rob laughed. "You'll never know. But you know how he gets when he's off the rocker..." "Rob." My voice sounded strangled. "Seriously, did James cheat on me?" "If he did, it was with Mason."

"Are you getting cold feet or something?" I looked down at my feet. "No. I'm worried that he is." "He's not. If there's one thing I'm sure about, it's James' addiction to you. I mean, like, obsession." Rob cleared his throat. "Sorry, those weren't the best words. What I mean is that he loves you." "So, you think that's true too?" Isabella had said that to me. It was different hearing it from Rob. I believed Rob. "That he loves you? Yes, he's crazy about you." "No, that he's addicted to me." Rob paused. "You know it's different. You're actually good for him. Perfect, really. The two of you together just makes sense. He's good now. He's happy. You did that."

My back arched and all my worries began to float away, replaced by pure bliss. "James!" Yes! I reached out for him. He grabbed my arm and pulled me back to a seated position as his lips smashed against mine. There was an urgency to the way he kissed me, a hunger. And I wanted to satiate that need. He continued to thrust in and out of me, riding out my orgasm.

"Give me your hands." I put my hands out in front of me and watched him wrap the phone cord around my wrists, tightening it so that it only just dug into my skin. I looked up at him. "You dreamed of tying me up?"

Close your eyes, baby." His words immediately heated me up again. I closed my eyes and felt something silky drape across my eyes. It must have been his tie, even though I hadn't seen him take it off. He tied it behind my head and he cupped my chin in his hand. His thumb ran across my bottom lip. "Do you want to play a game?"

"Lie down," he said and lightly pushed between my breasts until my back was pressed against his desk again. I felt his hands on my hips, slowly removing my skirt, leaving me completely naked. I heard him walk around to the other side of his desk. He grabbed my hands and pulled them above my head. When he released me a moment later, I couldn't move my arms.

"Stay there." I heard his footsteps leave the desk. "Where are you going?" "I'll be right back. Stay still." I tried to move my arms again, but couldn't. "Don't you dare leave me like this, James." But the door had already closed. Shit. This was why people didn't have office sex. I still couldn't move my arms. What was I attached to? I put my heels on the edge of the desk and pushed back until I could move my arms slightly.

A knock on the door made me jump. Fuck! "Now that's a sight to see," James said. "James, what the hell?" I pulled on the phone cord and made the drawer open and slam shut. "Anyone could have walked in." "The door is locked. I never even left." His voice was getting closer. "I just wanted to see what you did when you thought I wasn't watching."

"And you're terrible at following directions."

"I asked you to sta...

"Now, you're going to stay still."

"Each time you move, I'm going to have to stop whatever I'm doing to lap up the coffee before it spills on my desk."

"What are you going to be doing to me?" "Teasing you until you follow the rules." "James, don't you have a lot of work to catch up on? And someone might stop by to talk to..."

"How about you tell me why you were upset earlier." He kissed the side of my neck. I kept my mouth shut.

"You kissed Isabella." His hands fell from my thighs. "What?" The seduction from his voice was gone.

"I saw you kiss her." "Jesus, Penny, why didn't you say something sooner? I didn't fucking kiss Isabella."

With his other hand, he ran his thumb along my bottom lip again to keep me from biting it. "Then you only saw it for less than a second. Because she tried to kiss me, but I shoved her off immediately. I thought she was hugging me goodbye." "Why didn't you tell me?" "Because there was nothing to tell. Isabella means nothing to me. I wasn't going to upset you for no reason." "For no reason? Your ex wife kissed you and now you've been exchanging phone calls. You said she was being nice. What was I supposed to think?" And she's been harassing me. "That I would never cheat on you."

"James, I don't want to play this game anymore. Untie me." "You don't trust me."

There was a paper stuck to my sticky stomach. I peeled it off, but before I could look at it, James grabbed it. He crumpled it up and threw it in the trash. "What was that?" I asked as I put my bra back on. "I got distracted this morning. I keep rewriting my vows to you." My eyes darted back to his face. "James, I thought we agreed to just repeat the words that the minister says. You know I hate public speaking." He smiled and handed me my shirt. "Baby, you're great at public speaking. You would have gotten an A in my class if you hadn't started sleeping with me. Or if we hadn't gotten caught."

"And don't worry about what Nita thinks. She is very aware of the fact that your afternoon lunch visits the past few years sometimes resulted in sex because I always asked her not to disturb us and winked at her." "No you didn't..." I stopped when I saw the playful expression on his face. "James! You didn't really, did you?"

got an email from my stock broker, Bill O'Neill, today. A memo for the stocks I sold after work today. You can jump in any time, Penny." Shit. I had forgotten to tell Bill to not send any emails. I bit my lip. I didn't know how much James knew. Offering any information would just make it worse. James downed the rest of his scotch. "So, I called him. Apparently I'm investing in Uber? Again?" The more he talked the angrier he looked. I still stayed silent. "So I called my bank to see what account the money had been transferred to. But it was gone. Once the money came through, it was transferred to an account that wasn't mine. Why aren't you saying anything?" He looked so mad. "You don't understand." "I know I don't understand. That's why I'm trying to talk to you. Why did you liquidate 20 million dollars worth of stocks?" "I'm sorry. I can't tell you." Please believe me.

He laughed. "Penny." He stood up. "When you turned my parents down for money, I was so sure. I was so sure that what we had was real. That you weren't after me for my money."

"Stop lying! You promised you wouldn't lie to me," he repeated. He ran his hands through his hair. "Isabella tried to warn me. She said that you didn't love me. She always said you were after my money." "Why would you believe her? Have the past two and a half years meant nothing to you?" He shook his head. "Because she was right. You just wanted me for my money." "I fell in love with you when you were my professor. You could have been broke. I still would have loved you, James." "You don't love me. Stop lying to me. What's the point now? You got what you wanted. Just go." "That's not true. I love you. All I want is to marry you. I'm not going anywhere."

"I know. I know that Isabella took these. She gave them to me a few days ago. And she told me I couldn't trust you. But I didn't listen. Because I trusted you. With everything. I was wrong." It looked like he was about to cry. I had never seen him like this.

"You weren't wrong, James. You can trust me. Please just believe me. We're being blackmailed. I had to transfer the money so there wouldn't be pictures of us having sex leaked all over the internet." He laughed and shook his head back and forth. "God, all you do is lie. You're leaving me, right? That's what this is?" "No." "And you needed money before you left me?" he said like he hadn't even heard what I had just said. "So you could run away with him?"

don't love Tyler. I don't want to be with Tyler. And we're certainly not running away together. James..." "Then why did you transfer 20 million dollars into Tyler's bank account?" "I didn't." I transferred it to Isabella's account. Fuck. That bitch set me up. "I didn't." My voice sounded so small. Oh God, no. My whole body felt cold.

"Please just go." He wiped his hand underneath his eyes. I had never seen James cry. It killed me. He was crying because he thought I didn't love him. It felt like my heart was breaking. "Those pictures aren't what they seem. I don't love Tyler. I love you. I love everything about you. This whole thing is just a misunderstanding."

"Just save it. I don't care, Penny. You're not my problem anymore." "Problem? Is that what I've always been? Just something you had to take care of?"

"You certainly can't take care of yourself. You're immature. And selfish. And ungrateful." "Ungrateful for what? This house that I didn't want? Because I don't like spending your money?" "I try to give you everything and you always pretended like you didn't want it. You played me." "I didn't play you. I don't care about your money. And this?" I picked up the picture he had of Austin kissing me. "I trusted you when you kissed Isabella. All I'm asking is for you to do the same. She orchestrated the pictures. You can't believe anything she says."

My phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my purse and looked down at the text: "Don't you dare. All I have to do is press enter." "What could possibly be more important than this conversation, Penny? Unless it's him?" "It's not Tyler." Isabella must have cameras in here. She's been watching us this whole time. "You know this isn't about Tyler. You know that. We're just friends." He shook his head. "You stole from me. For him. And you don't even have an explanation." "I didn't steal. You said what's yours is mine." "Come on, Penny. That's just something people say. And I don't know what love is. Obviously. We're calling the wedding off just in time. Because I just liked fucking you. That's all I know. I need another drink." "You don't mean that."

"What I need is for you to either tell me why you stole from me or get the hell out of my house." "I already told you! You won't believe me. Because you trust your ex wife more than you trust me." "Because she never needed my money! God, my parents were right the whole time. You can't trust someone who comes from nothing. All they'll want is your money."

"We'll take care of it." He handed my phone back to me. "And we'll talk to James. None of this is your fault." "No." I shook my head. "It's deeper than that. We're not...it's over." It pained me to say it. But it was true. I couldn't marry James. He didn't love me. It didn't matter how much I loved him. If he didn't trust me after everything we had been through, he never would. "I'm sorry to hear that," his dad said.

He shouldn't have given up on me. He shouldn't have said those things to me. All I had ever done was love him. Unconditionally. That's what love was. It was unconditional. James didn't love me. He had never loved me. I was holding on to something that had never existed. It felt like I was melting into the rain.

I kept walking, like I knew where I was going. But I was completely lost. The truth was, I had nowhere to go. I hadn't come from nothing, but I felt like I was nothing now. Nothing without him. I just needed to get to the airport. I needed to get as far away from New York as two thousand dollars would take me.

"I don't need James' handouts." "I came after you by myself. Just get in the car. Please." "How did you find me?" "You have a GPS in your phone." "James tracks me?" "He worries about you." "He's not worried about me anymore." "That's not true. He loves you. You know that." "Did he say that to you?" I let a small spark of hope run through me.