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One thing is also true: your life can’t be destroyed if you don’t allow people access.
“Life is made up of a web of experiences and emotions. They are the only two things we have in life no matter who you are, where you live, or what you do. You’re going to experience things, and you’re going to feel things.” I mull that over. It seems true. I’ve never thought of life like that, but I’m not sitting around pondering life’s greatest mysteries either. Joseph shifts in his chair, wincing as he moves to face me. He looks me in the eyes. “The key to life—the key to everything—is who you choose to build your web around,”
“When I’m gone,” he says, starting again, “Bellamy will have no one. There will be no one to celebrate her birthdays.” His voice breaks once again. This time, it doesn’t find its rhythm. “There will be no one to make sure she makes it home after she stays out too long with Larissa. Nobody will make sure she goes to the doctor when she gets bronchitis in the fall or makes her chicken noodle soup without carrots. And that …” Tears stream down his cheeks in a quiet river. “That’s what keeps me up at night.”
Our relationship could be enemies-to-lovers, but it’s always heavy on the enemies and light on the lovers.
She smells like amber and feels like silk, and I’m not sure how I’m ever going to crawl out of this bed and be the person I was when I climbed in. This feeling is every love song I’ve ever sang, every
emotion I’ve tried to elicit with a constructed lyric. It’s calm in the midst of an unpredictable world. It’s safe when nothing else feels solid. It’s like the last piece of the puzzle that you find under the rug snapped into place, and the hours of searching for that one tiny piece finally pays off. Now that I’ve experienced it, I’m not sure how I’ll ever be with someone who doesn’t evoke this kind of reaction.
“If you ever need anything, you call me, and I’ll either talk to you, come home, or fly you to me,” I tell her. “You wanna fight, fuck, or flee your life for a while—I’m your man.”
“Loving someone is action. It’s communicating and compromising and working your ass off.
Life’s not meant to be lived in fear. It’s not meant to be lived alone either. It’s meant to be experienced. Life is meant to be lived, not survived. It’s for loving and fighting and complete mess-making. Life is for taking risks and winning and losing and learning. Thriving.
