Alec

by William di Canzio

But just as important to his education was Alec’s understanding that both of his teachers were like him. This enriched his knowledge of himself and his kind: of himself, because he found he possessed this particular insight by nature; of his kind, because he now saw there were many of his sort, throughout all livelihoods and social classes, as different from one another as were folks who called themselves normal. Both these men, he likewise intuited, were trapped. That understanding was also part of his education. He hoped he would avoid their mistakes. Clearly Mr. Grant became aroused when his students stripped down to spar at his Sunday gatherings; yet he seemed to disapprove of himself on their behalf for doing so. He’d try to disguise Eros as sportsmanship by showing them some new punch or footwork, but what the man truly craved was their touch and affection. Alec figured he was too knotted up inside to admit the desire, much less to act on it. Alec wished he could say, It’s all right, sir, go ahead, feel us up—we all think you’re grand and we’d feel you right back.